Saved by the Porno

2006 has not been kind to Dustin "Screech" Diamond. In June the former child star went public about being so totally broke that his humble Wisconsin home was in danger of foreclosure. Screech did what any industrious American pop culture icon would do when strapped for cash; he set up a Web site (getdshirts.com) and sold T-shirts. Then last month the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel ran a story claiming that Screech and his lady friend suspiciously bailed out of a recent Internet telethon to save said house (but only after they'd run up a $600 hotel bill). The Sentinel reports that, while Screech has been "pretty far behind" with payments, he still has the option to take out a mortgage and a foreclosure may not be as imminent as he's making it out to be. But we shouldn't worry about the guy. He'll be fine. After all, he has that new Dirty Sanchez sex tape that he's shopping around and his illustrious stand-up career to fall back on. Nobody told you? Yeah, Screech does stand-up. I know, the mere thought of it is just disgusting. Dustin Diamond appears at Hyena's Comedy Club, 605 Houston St. in Fort Worth, at 8:30 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Friday and 8 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Saturday. Admission is $10 with a two-drink minimum. Call 817-877-5233 or visit hyenascomedynightclub.com/ftworth.
Fri., Oct. 20, 8:30 & 10:30 p.m.; Sat., Oct. 21, 8 & 10:30 p.m.
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Geoff Johnston