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The Ruby Revue Wants You. Like, Sexually.

There's been a lot of talk about tassels around here, so it stands to reason that your own nips might feel a little neglected. Well, fortune favors the bold (and the voluptuous, wink wink) and you too can show off that bad bod, and all the miraculous things it can do, at The Pin Up Show -- a pageant that will crown Miss Dallas Burlesque Festival Pin Up, 2012.

Think that's a mouthful? Wait till ya get a load of ... Heyo!

Burlesque is booming in Big D, and the preeminent Ruby Revue seeks fresh faces for the pageant, which will kick off the Fourth Annual Dallas Burlesque Festival, running from February 2 through 5 at the House of Blues. Contestants will model both evening wear and lingerie -- which they will need to provide for themselves -- and a panel of four judges will choose four finalists who will then vie for pure night club currency: crowd response and applause. The democratically chosen winner receives a prize package worth over $200 and the envy of all of us chicken-shits in the crowd.

So, you got the va va and the voom? Been waiting for just the right social event to debut that spike-studded G-string or rhinestone encrusted ... doctoral hood?

Email a head shot, full-body shot (as in ".jpg," not tequila) and your bio to [email protected] by January 26.

Then, just sit back for your call back -- which we're sure you'll get on January 30.

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Brentney Hamilton