Girl With No Job Plans To Get To Know Dallas Before She Jokes About Us

Claudia Oshry
Claudia Oshry Anthony Vasquez
Claudia Oshry is just a girl with no job. But of course she has nearly half a dozen jobs, all consisting of buzz words that baby boomers roll their eyes at.

She's the social media personality behind the Instagram account @girlwithnojob that began as a blog about her internship (when she was girl with a job). But when she was fired, the real success took off. Today, @girlwithnojob has 3 million followers (including Cara Delevingne and Harry Styles), where Oshry posts hilarious and relatable memes. She hosts a morning podcast each weekday with her also-Instagram-famous sister Jackie, and now Claudia is taking her witty remarks about all things pop culture to various theaters all over the country. She stops in Dallas on March 9, and the first show is already sold out.

Why are you doing press if the show is already sold out?
I'm just — I don't know. I'm just wanting everybody to hear all about the Dirty Jeans Tour. I'm actually adding another show. Tomorrow, the tickets go on sale. I was kind of nervous about it, but it's Dallas Strong, so I'm feeling good about it.

When you get to these venues and the manager finds out you're an Instagram celebrity, what is typically the reaction?
You know, it's so funny just because a lot of the venues that I play are like these old-school, traditional, like real. They don't really know what to expect and I really always warn them that the crowd is rowdy and they drink. And I'm always like, 'You're going to see crazy girls,' and they're like, 'Yeah, we've seen it all.' I'm like, 'OK, then.' By the end of the night, they're like, 'Man, I've never seen anything like that.' I'm like, 'I tried to tell you.'

Do you think people take you less seriously?
For sure. I mean there's definitely a stigma when you come from the internet. I mean it's annoying, but I don't really care. The stigma is someone has success on the internet and then you meet them in real life and they just fall flat and they don't translate and they're not funny, so I like to think that I don't have that problem. I love the opportunity to meet people in real life and prove I'm not just someone from the internet and I have IRL charisma.

You have jokes and you sing?
I mean I sing in my show the same way I do in real life, and that's just like in any given moment I'm gonna hit a high note. You never know when it's gonna hit you. I love singing and I think in my wildest dreams I would be on tour for singing, but you know, that's not how life worked out for me. So now I just take every opportunity of being onstage to be like, you know what, this is my Taylor Swift moment.

The Dirty Jeans Tour is just you. Is there a chance you'll take The Morning Toast on the road?
I mean I think that's like a dream of ours. It really just depends on scheduling because just between life, tour, being a dog mom, I hate missing the Toast every day and when I go on tour and I have to be away from the Toast — because a lot of people rely on it just as part of their daily routine at work or at home — so I feel this responsibility, so we have to work out the timing. It would have to be after the Dirty Jeans Tour, but it's definitely something we wanna do.

How has The Morning Toast changed your life?
I mean The Morning Toast has changed my life in every way. I think there's something really cool and intimate about becoming a part of someone's life five days a week. I imagine it's how people who religiously watch The View or other daytime shows feel. You're letting someone into your home, and there's something about the internet that just makes it more intimate and more serious. People are letting us into their bathtubs and their commutes and their living rooms and that's really cool. I think the fandom was taken to the next level just because of that intimacy and I'm so grateful to everyone who listens to the Toast and everyone who follows me on Instagram because there's really this connection over a mutual love of celebrities and music and TV and that's fun just to talk about for an hour a day.

Do you think people treat you differently because you are so accessible?
Like anything, it has a positive and a negative and I think the positives are really overwhelming. Sometimes meeting someone who you follow or you like their work, it can be intimidating. As someone who is obsessed with celebrities, having run into celebrities at restaurants or anywhere, it's nerve-wracking and intimidating and it can be kind of awkward. But I don't really have that because if I ever get the opportunity to meet any listener or fan at a meet-and-greet, it doesn't feel awkward because, like, I know everything about them and they know everything about me. I've stalked them on Instagram; they've stalked me. That awkwardness is removed just because I have been so open and so have they.

Did you stalk me on Instagram before this?
I mean, I'm not gonna lie. I forgot to shower last night and my hair smelled so bad so I was running so fast before this phone call just because I was trying to wash my hair. But I definitely will after this.

No, no, no. I was just wondering.
Are you public?

OK, I'll check it out.

So on @girlwithnojob, the memes that aren't credited, those are memes you're making, right?
It's a good mixed bag of stuff. I make a lot of the stuff. I source a lot of the stuff. If it's a tweet with the handle in it, it belongs to the tweeter. Sometimes it's things I've made, (husband) Ben's made. When I make stuff, I don't like to watermark it, just because I think it makes it look ugly and I've accepted the fact that it's on the internet now and it's gonna do its thing and I'm OK with that.

How much time are you spending making memes?
A lot. The thing about being on tour is you get a lot of downtime in airports and in cars, and it's actually been really great for my content — both for my Instagram Stories and my Instagram posts. I just have a lot of time alone on my phone, which is really my happy place, so even though it seems I'm a lot busier and would have less time for it, it actually opened up a lot of good creative time for me.

I want to talk about @fuckjerry and people stealing content. Where do you see the future of all of that going? I know they're now asking for permission to use content.
Yeah, and I think that's great. I think I come from an interesting perspective ... as both an Instagram creator and curator and also a comedian, I kind of understand both sides. And the thing about the internet, it's just the wild, wild west. So I'm actually really interested to see what happens now that the conversation is being had. Honestly, I don't know now.

I know you've mentioned a book. Do you have any plans to actually write one?
I'm always writing. I have a Google doc on just 1 million thoughts and journal entries. I think long term that's definitely something I would love to do, but I'm very aware of how much I have going on and I don't want to be that person that promises and does a million things and doesn't deliver or does deliver and doesn't do their best. So right now my mind is on tour, tour, tour, making the Toast into a billion-dollar brand. That's my focus. But when I do have some free time — that's how I got started — blogging, writing, so it would be really full circle for me and it's definitely on my list of things to do.

I know you tailor your shows to each city, so how far in advance are you writing Dallas jokes before your Dallas show? Thirty minutes in advance, a week in advance?
Not 30 minutes. It's so funny because a lot of these places I haven't been to before, so the material can come to me as I'm there and I'll usually get there the morning before, so I'll write jokes usually on the plane. It's like the perfect place because I don't get Wi-Fi and I'm up in the air for two or three hours just writing jokes, like just things people know about Dallas. But actually experiencing Dallas is a whole other thing, so when I'm there I try to just go to a restaurant or get the vibe of the city because I haven't been to Dallas before and I'm really excited to go.

How did you learn to write jokes?
Oh my God. Honestly, it's really hard. That was my biggest thing. It's like I've always been — growing up, people were like, 'Oh, you're so funny.' I'm like conversationally funny and I'm a great guest at a dinner party (Laughs). And the thing about stand-up is it's practice and it's written jokes and it's almost like scripted and rehearsed and that felt in the beginning so unnatural to me as someone who's just gotten success off being off-the-cuff funny. I don't prepare for the jokes. I sit down and read the stories five minutes before (on the Toast) and everything I say is on a whim. So stand-up felt really unnatural to me, and I had to start out in really short segments of 30 minutes and then 45 and then an hour. I've been on tour now for a little over a year, and only a few months ago did I feel like I really got to a place of feeling comfortable onstage, feeling comfortable doing my written jokes but also doing a little improv. It's a little bit of both. I don't know how to write a joke, to be honest. To me I think of it as just like writing a tweet. When I have a funny thought, I just write it down.
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Paige Skinner has written for the Dallas Observer since 2014.
Contact: Paige Skinner