Start stretching now. This Friday and Saturday Dallas' most limber fight it out for a pretty giant prize: a coveted spot on So You Think You Can Dance. Are you still on the fence about auditioning? No worries, we got you. Here are five reasons why you should (or shouldn't) flex your skills at McFarlin Memorial Auditorium this weekend.
1.) You Sorta Think You Can Dance: This one is kind* of important. If Nigel Lythgue walked up to you right now and demanded to know if you thought you could dance, would you:
A.) Shrug. B.) Bust out a liturgical opus, incorporating everything from the Fox Trot to Krumping. C.) Two words: human statue.
If you said "B," you might have a chance at this.
2.) You Need a Tan: If the Dancing Hand Of Fate plucks you from the pack and drops you into the next level of auditions, you'll be flown to Los Angeles. The high in Los Angeles today is 74 degrees, the roads are currently being repaved with tacos and fame waits around every corner! (Industry trick: If you can get a celebrity to high-five you, their powers transfer. Try this every single time that you meet one.)
3.) You Might Find a Use for $250,000: Dude, let's get real. $250,000 is enough to pay off that Victoria Secret card you were bewitched into getting/maxing out; pay back that "guy" who fronted you for "that thing," and stock your home bar with more Ciroc that Diddy has in his 42 ice cream palaces, combined.
4.)The Season Winner Graces the Cover of Dance Spirit Magazine: Little known fact: Dance Spirit recently out-circulated Cat Fancy, Dream Catcher Weekly, and American Bee Journal. This is mega.
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5.) You're Between The Ages Of 18 and 30: The same rules apply with nude self-portraits, going (back) to community college and tramp stamps. Do it now or do it never. Your future self thanks you for taking a risk while you still meet the qualifications, because after a certain age it isn't a matter of "should I" or "shouldn't I." It just falls into the ever-expanding junk drawer of Things I'm Officially Too Old To Do.
* Editor's Note: If you In No Way Think You Can Dance, then you might just grab a corn dog and tub of ice-cream sandwiches, sit nearby and casually mock those participating. The phrase "How's this for athletic?" works especially well when followed by log-jamming donuts into your pie hole.
Registration begins at 8 a.m., and all participants are encouraged to commit for the weekend, lest they be selected for the next round of eliminations. For registration forms and information, visit the show's website.