Each morning on 96.3 KSCS, host Hawkeye on his show Hawkeye in the Morning takes a call from a listener who went on a (seemingly great) date with someone, but they are sad because they never heard back from said date.
Hawkeye takes it upon himself to then call said date (seemingly out of the blue) and ask them if they are OK with speaking on the air. They always say yes, and then Hawkeye asks why they ghosted the listener.
Said date then tells Hawkeye why they never called the listener back. And it's always the most absurd reason. She peed on the sidewalk. He made me pay for the dinner. He's a cougar chaser. Hawkeye pretends to care. Then Hawkeye says to said date, "Oh, we have your bad date on the other line. Do you wanna say hi?"
This happens every morning around 8:35 a.m. You're telling me there are enough people in Dallas who listen to KSCS, go on bad dates, and call KSCS for help? Ha! I may be stupid, but I ain't dumb.
On Aug. 21, a listener named David calls Hawkeye because he had a really great time with Megan. They even kissed goodnight! Hawkeye calls Megan and Megan's mom answers!
"Hi, is this Megan?"
"No, Megan is in school." (Information you typically readily offer to a strange man on the phone.)
"Oh, OK. This is Hawkeye and Jasmine and Connected K from KCSC Hawkeye in the Morning. Did she go to college?"
"No, she's in high school." (Again. Information you just give away.)
Hawkeye then explains to Megan's mom that he is calling on behalf of David. David thought Megan was 21 years old! Megan's mom is shocked. Megan is only 17. David is 22. Where are the police! Hawkeye tells Megan's mom that Megan and David met on Tinder. Megan's mom doesn't even know what Tinder is! Then they tell Megan's mom that Megan has an Uber account! Megan told her mom that she was going to the movies! But she actually went on a date with 22-year-old David and did shots! Where are the police?
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When you listen to the clip of Hawkeye and Megan's mom and David, you will notice how quick everyone is to answer and how quickly everything is resolved. And also how bad the acting is. I am no Columbo, but damn! I! Am! Not! Stupid! Hawkeye in the Morning did not respond to multiple requests for comment.
I do know that someone's going to be in trouuuuuuuble.