Here's a College-Level Course in How Not to Prepare Your Campus for a Shooting

That guy you see up there is J.C. Drake, the police chief at North Lake College in Irving. Chief Drake is real worried about all the school shootings, so he decided to do something about it. He decided to offer a course, apparently to students and also staff, in how to handle a campus shooter.

But the course went terribly awry, as WFAA reported last night, because the college neglected to tell anyone that they may hear some odd noises -- maybe some banging, maybe some screaming, maybe some actual live gunfire.

CALLER: "We need help at North Lake College at the T Building. Please! They're shooting!" DISPATCHER: "Okay. North Lake College?" CALLER: "Yes, hurry!" DISPATCHER: "Ma'am?" CALLER: "Somebody's shooting!"

Yep. That's the 911 call.

The college will review its notification procedures. While it's at it, it might want to take another crack at the curriculum. Because according to the video below, its current tactical approach to fending off a heavily armed lunatic involves jocularly throwing textbooks at him before prancing directly through his line of fire to give him a big ol' bear hug, you silly mass-murderer you.