Bartlett who?
Sheesh, the promotions folks at D magazine, like most of the city, apparently don't read D either. We were led to this unsurprising conclusion by their new bus ad campaign, which poses the question: "Where's our arena?"

Had they read D--official magazine for the rich and callous--about a year ago, an article by former Mayor Steve Bartlett answered their question: Laura Miller deep-sixed it. That's where.

In his attempt to debunk what he called the "Miller Myths," Bartlett credited Miller and the Dallas Observer with power we wouldn't claim in our most booze-and-sun-addled dreams. Nevertheless, she did write a ton of exposes about the mayor and the slimy back-room shenanigans that were going down on the arena deal.

She's really hangin' with Yeltsin
You can't believe everything you read in the newspaper. When it comes to the Fort Worth Star-Telegram--add to that and then some.

Take basic information like who's in charge. If, up through last Monday, you naively consulted the box at the top of the S-T's editorial page (right above the highly credible pontifications on things like the future of Amtrak and the IRS), you might feel compelled to believe that Debbie M. Price is the paper's "Vice President, Executive editor."

You would, of course, be wrong.
The Baltimore Sun announced last week that Debbie--whose job status, or lack thereof, has been a matter of debate following a very curious management coup at the S-T a few months ago--is the Sun's newest general assignment reporter. But Price's name mysteriously remained on the S-T's masthead for several days after the Sun hired her, and she was still being sent paychecks by her former employer. Debbie, who according to her lawyer believes she has been sacked, has been refusing the checks.

But, then again, why should you believe us?

Who says nothing happens in Arlington?
Hey! Anybody at the Arlington Morning News for fries? We're sure we can get you a great deal down at Jack in the Box.

That's the only upside we can think of in the buttocks-smooching, top-of-the-fold, AMN lead news item that gushed about Jack in the Box introducing a new french fry. It included a large full-color photo of an order of "Jumbo Fries," apparently for the benefit of illiterate Arlingtonians.

You're probably a bit disoriented right off because this free ad would seem to have been based on a national story in a paper that usually takes local coverage to absurd levels. But you would be forgetting that there are Jack in the Boxes in Arlington--making it a local story. Right?

Apparently, by careful scrutiny of a press release, the AMN scooped everyone--possibly even Jack in the Box's advertising department--with the news that the Box has a new french fry. The in-depth story even interviewed Arlingtonians and Jack in the Box employees about what they thought of the fries.

They liked them.
Tastefully buried in the story was the unfortunate 1993 incident in which Jack in the Box was linked to an e. coli outbreak in Washington state that left some people dead.

Maybe the AMN can look into a rumor going around that McDonald's has a new burger--for adults!

--Glen Warchol