Cheap Bastard

Thai Lotus Kitchen: Cheap, Seedy and Delicious, Just the Way We Like It.

Walking down Cedar Springs, you immediately notice Thai Lotus Kitchen. It's the skanky, busted place right next to the Black Eyed Pea that everyone is glaring at, whispering about and avoiding. It's the Brooke Hogan of restaurants in Oak Lawn. It somehow managed to look skeezier than the dude I saw on the crosswalk who was laughing at a "parking in rear" sign. So, duh, I pulled up a chair.

Inside, Thai Lotus was as sketchy as its janked-up exterior had promised. It was dark, dank, small and pretty much empty. (If you're reading those as negative characteristics, you should go ahead and go get your virgin mudslide from Friday's and stop reading this.) I was ecstatic.

Thai Lotus offers several lunch specials for $7.99 and $8.99. There are curries, there are rice options, noodle options—pretty much all the Thai food lunch special staples.

First thing that came out was a small bowl of broth with cilantro and some veggies in it. I didn't like it (kinda had a stuff-that-floated-up-from-the-garbage-disposal vibe), but it was free, so I don't hold it against them. Never get mad at someone for giving you free shit. Even if it's literally free pieces of their own shit. They were clearly just trying to be nice, and if they're giving you their dumps it's your fault for seeming like someone who would be into that kind of thing.

After the weird free soup came the spicy basil rice with tofu that I ordered, which is my current favorite dish from my current favorite quick-and-easy Thai place in Dallas, Thai 2 Go. I was really glad to see the spicy basil rice dish on the lunch specials menu at Thai Lotus and was even happier when it turned out to be delicious. It wasn't as blow-your-mind-in-the-face delicious as the same dish from Thai 2 Go, but it was certainly better than average. And the fact that Thai Lotus is located within walking distance of my favorite Oak Lawn crack den (I'm speaking of Hunky's, of course) means it'll be oh-so convenient for my next "Let's Get Black-Out Drunk On Oak Lawn, Y'all!" stumble-fest. See you there.