The River of Death Gets State Funds. Because It's The River of Death. Well, It Used to Be.

Apparently, Governor Rick Perry thinks half a million bucks will clean up the Trinity River. He has been sniffing his hairspray again?

Governor Rick Perry--whose new campaign ads look more like Just For Men spots, said KTCK-AM (1310) morning show host George Dunham this a.m.--announced today the state's gonna give $500,000 "in state seed money and in-kind contributions" to improve the Trinity River's ecosystem and its water quality. (I know, I know: What water? And: Only half a mil to clean up a sewage system? Isn't that like flushing good money down a toilet?) The dough's gonna flow toward the Trinity River Basin Environmental Restoration project. According to a press release that went out from the governor's office today, the money will go toward "storm water control, irrigation programs and education." Also, says the release:

"These funds plus additional state and private dollars that could be contributed toward this effort could leverage as much as $30 million in the next three to five years to develop a comprehensive water flow model with the Army Corps of Engineers, improve water quality, enhance wildlife habitat, and expand ecotourism opportunities in the Trinity River Basin. Funds also will be used to leverage federal dollars for grants for the rural areas of the basin.

'The cities of Ft. Worth and Dallas both have major ongoing Trinity River projects, and I compliment city and county leaders for their vision for restoring the vitality of this great river,' Perry said. 'Our objective is to work closely with the cities, private landowners, federal, and state agencies to build on the success that the Metroplex has enjoyed.'"

Oh, Jim? --Robert Wilonsky