Lex and Terry's wet dream

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SFX's confidence in The Lex and Terry Show is reflected by its investment in it, but the company will still be selective in deciding where to place the show, while giving the duo a chance to gain credibility in Dallas. Of course, the company can afford to take its time, especially since it has The John Boy and Billy Show and The Bob and Tom Network at its disposal.

Wall Street analyst Andy VanHouton, the managing director at the New York firm B.T Alex Brown who is tracking SFX's growth, says the syndication of The Lex and Terry Show is simply part of a corporate equation designed to boost ratings.

"The radio ratings business can be volatile," VanHouton says. "You want to try to minimize that volatility, and if you have on-air talent that you want to groom and develop, not only for a local market but to leverage that off regionally, why not do it? This has been the strategy for SFX. It's icing on the cake."

Naturally, Staley and Jaymes are more than thankful that SFX brought them aboard, but they say they're still anxious about the sudden corporate influence on their careers.

"That's the scary part. A lot of people are involved in our careers and making decisions for us, where we really trust our gut instinct. We trusted it when we came here. We trusted it when we met each other," Jaymes says. "Now, there's too many people making decisions for us."

Staley concurs.
"They're trying to give us an off-line producer right now that'll, like, book guests for us and it's, like, we don't want any part of it," Staley says. "It's just another person we gotta deal with."

While many radio personalities would beg for additional support staff, Staley and Jaymes say the prospect of their show expanding seems contrary to the free-for-all format they've embraced since they first went on the air in Jacksonville.

"We don't do recorded things. Nothing on our show is recording. Everything's live. Nothing is set up," Jaymes says.

"And I'll tell you why," adds Staley. "We're lazy."

A steady stream of callers has been flowing into the phone lines at Q102's studio. Although there is a pretty good mix of callers from the metroplex and Savannah, the majority of the calls are coming from Jacksonville.

Stationed at a keyboard off to the left, Maria handles the phones, steadily typing in the location of callers and a brief description of the topic they wish to discuss. The information flashes onto a computer monitor stationed in front of Lex and Terry, who are separated by a sound-effects machine programmed with noises of people humping, buzzers, and sound bites from Wayne's World.

Howie, the producer, mans the sound board and maintains communication with Sam Kouvaris, a Jacksonville television anchor who checks in from his bedroom three times during the show to talk sports. Andrea Pilcher, the "total news babe," is in the neighboring studio, compiling the day's headlines for her news updates.

America's most fucked-up call-in show or America's most wanted call-in show, depending on the promotional spot, is on the air. Despite the number of calls, Lex and Terry haven't found anyone particularly hilarious, but they have found a lot of Michael Liles.

At one point in the morning, the computer monitor reveals that a Jacksonville man was calling to say he was looking for "good-looking chicks to do;" another was convinced that his beard was keeping the chicks away; and a woman from Savannah needed advice on her new boyfriend.

Staley's off-handed description of Madonna as a "skank" prompts a response from a male caller who disagrees, and the pair fall back on their "who would you do" gig, a dated routine that was popular in Jacksonville.

Predictably, the show's tempo gains speed when porn star Juli Ashton arrives at the tiny studio along with the owner of Caligula XXI, where Ashton will strip over the weekend. Ashton was supposed to appear on the show the day before, but forgot.

The host of Playboy's Night Calls, a cable TV show where the star takes sex calls in the nude while fooling around with female guests, Ashton is a good fit for Lex and Terry. Shortly after her appearance, the computer monitor floods with callers for Ashton.

Lex and Terry, their minds working in unison, immediately take a call from a woman who has a question about shaving. Specifically, she wants to know how Ashton shaves "down there" without getting razor burn, cuts, or itchy stubble.

Like a 7-Eleven cashier giving directions, Ashton calmly explains that the woman will need lubrication, a double-edged razor, and really hot water. "The important thing," she says, "is to loofah afterwards."

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Rose Farley
Contact: Rose Farley