Belly Up, Baby

Everybody's got a talent. Something they're just really, really good at. Like Jim Schutze. He's good at lighting Wick Allison's bow tie on fire. Or Kevin Federline. He's good at being a douchebag. But some of us are extra-blessed, fortunate enough to have not one but two skills.

Take 25-year-old ShaeLyn Werner, mother of six from Dallas. Not only can the woman manipulate sperm for maximum baby-making potential, but she's also something of a fashion designer. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that she may be able to list "extreme flexibility of the lower body" as a third skill.

Werner has recently tapped into a (literally) growing market: pregnant Christians who need religious-themed maternity wear that does not suck. Currently pregnant with her fifth "biological" kid -- hey, I'm just quoting the press release here; I didn't ask for the Jerry Springer back story -- Werner "founded Christian Couture out of her faith and passion for apparel design." Methinks Coco Chanel might quibble with Werner's definition of a "Blessed Belly" ribbed tank as couture, but I'm not here to split hairs. I'm here to educate.

Now, go forth and multiply Werner's profits. --Andrea Grimes

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Robert Wilonsky
Contact: Robert Wilonsky