If so, Dallas director Gurinder Chadha wants to talk to you. From the sound of this, the director's been to Texas to scout locations for the big-screen adaptation of the TV show, which probably tickles Dallas Film Commission honcho Janis Burklund; maybe they'll shoot J.R. in, or around, Dallas after all. But first Chadha needs to find a spread bigger than the disappointingly "small" Southfork: Says the director, "I'm going to find us a super-duper ranch, because you have to believe they all have these massive wings to themselves. Plus, we'll have an airstrip for private jets and helicopters." Tom Hicks, we're looking at you. --Robert Wilonsky