Get Snippy

I like most animals more than I like most people. Animals, on the whole, are much kinder. Your cat will never leave you stranded at the bar after a night of drinking so she can go home with a hot guy from the band. Your dog will never take you out for a nice seafood dinner and never call you again. And, if you do what any good pet owner should do and spay or neuter your pets, Fluffy will never get pregnant and run off with someone else's offspring--or, perhaps more accurately in this case, never get pregnant with someone else's offspring and come crying back bemoaning her plight (It was just a stupid mistake! I had too much catnip!)

You--you friggin' sap--and your pocketbook will inevitably be left to raise and/or distribute the passel. And if you think you're getting off easy because your pet is male and unable to conceive a surprise litter, may I suggest that the cost of treating testicular cancer in an animal--something likely to happen in an unneutered pet--is far more than the cost of coaxing one through animal birth.

This is all to say that if you live in zip codes 75203, 75211, 75212, 75216, 75217, 75224, 75227, 75228, 75232, 75233, 75236, 75237, 75241, 75253 and make less than $35,000 per year, two Dallas SPCA locations are providing free spay/neuter surgeries for your furry companions through September 1. Call the Dallas clinic for more info. --Andrea Grimes

KEEP THE DALLAS OBSERVER FREE... Since we started the Dallas Observer, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Dallas, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Robert Wilonsky
Contact: Robert Wilonsky