Let Me Ask To Speak With the Sportatorium: 5.19.09

Steal from Channel 8's old Let Me Speak To the Manger Manager and The Ticket's old Ask the Hard Line and what do you get?

A Tuesday time-waster featuring a bunch of people asking questions and one poor schmuck doing all the answering.

Q: Do you like salad?

   A: Only when it's tossed.

Q: Are you gay?

   A: Yes, extremely happy. Beyond content. Quickly approach giddy. Can't you tell?

Q: Is it Dirk No-VIT-ski or No-WIT-ski?

   A: no-WIT-ski.

Q: What was the decision-making process behind The Ticket's Plus-1 tryouts?

   A: After being underwhelmed by myself and the other candidates, I suspect The Ticket looked at the steady ratings and the substantial financial savings and merely promoted Corby. I do know that at one point a dude named Bob Sturm was seriously considered for Hammer's old seat.

Q: What's up with the old Live 105.3 hosts?

   A: See earlier today. Dan O'Malley is resurfacing weekends on The Fan. I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think J.D. Ryan, like Russ, is getting paid his salary through April 11 as well.

Q: Have you or Wilonsky been back on The Ticket since the Hammer story?

   A: I'm pretty sure Robert has, but I have not been invited back. Firstly, I couldn't because I'm on The Fan. Secondly, I hear management didn't take too kindly to the truth about their dealings with Greggo being revealed.

Q: What's your thickness and width?

   A: I'm 5-9 and 165 pounds. Surely that's what you mean, right?

Q: Have you put any of the weight on you lost on The Master Cleanser?

   A: Yes. I lost 14 pounds in 10 days on that diet, so I expected to gain some back. I guess I've gained back nine of the 14. Why, do these boxers make me look fat?

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