Rangers Survive April, and The Aporkalypse

Regardless the outcome of this afternoon's pitching duel between Vicente Padilla and Bobby Bragan, it's already - I'm sorry, I'm being told the Oakland pitcher is actually Dallas Braden - a successful April for the Texas Rangers.

Not only has Texas not had any players succumb to the international flu epigdemic - click here to see if you 'fraidy cats been infected - it will make it out of the season's first month with its best record since 2006. And, for now, manager Ron Washington holds onto his gig.

Last year the Rangers were 10-18 in April. Two years ago 10-15. This year, despite a wobbly 4-7 start, they'll be 10-11 at the worst.

And - despite Padilla floating 57 mph curveballs - they shouldn't lose this game. (At press time the Rangers trailed, 1-0.) Texas' starting lineup combined for a Major League-leading and franchise-record pace 39 homers; Oakland's an anemic 5.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to happy hour and then dinner. Isn't that what you're supposed to have as an appetizer before Cake?

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