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Re: Chuck E.M.F.'s Cheese's

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A good Friend of Unfair Park's, who would prefer to keep his name to hisself for reasons that will become clear after the jump, sends a missive concerning the missus' report from Chuck E. Cheese's yesterday. Seems the only thing good to come out of a gig at the joint are the stylish uniform and the complete lack of power that comes with it. Because God knows, when your joint's populated almost entirely by little kids, the last thing you want is the responsibility of making sure they're well taken care of. --Robert Wilonsky

Take it from a dude who proudly wore the polyester uniform of a Chuck E. employee in 1984 as a high school junior --- when kids went apeshit in the game room of the now defunct Chuck E. Cheese's near the now-defunct Prestonwood Mall, we were instructed by management to keep out of it unless a kid had a bloody fork lodged in his chest. Discipline and authority was not a power bestowed in the Chuck E. name tag.

Believe me I oughta know, seeing how many times I got kicked in the family jewels by some moppy-haired bastard while I was totally defenseless, dressed up in a smelly rat costume. Dignity was not something I was rewarded with in that job. I did get $4.00 an hour though. My only bargaining chip with the untamed offspring of Dallas County was I knew how to get tokens out of a jammed-up skeeball machines and they didn't.

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