Sorry, Brad Kirby, But Your Stray-Dog Ordinance Isn't Going to Fly With City Council

For whatever reason I read every single city council briefing package and memo -- man's got to have hobbies. But till today, I'd never seen one generated by a single citizen's appearance in front of the council, maybe because most who sign up to speak at the horseshoe are usually wrapped in plastic chains while trying to stay warm or cool off while taking shots at the mayor while continuing a 129-part monologue about the Bilderberg-Belo conspiracy to keep Jesus and Superman out of our schools. (Not Schutze. Not Schutze.)

But on January 13, one Brad Kirby stepped up to the lectern and asked the council to consider rewriting the Dallas City Code so that it would be illegal for someone to find a stray dog and not get it to the proper authorities ASAP. Per his proposal: "A person commits an offense if he takes possession or control of a dog under this section and knowingly fails to deliver it to the animal shelter or a licensed veterinarian for identification scanning with 48 hours."

The city took Kirby's proposal seriously: Code compliance and the City Attorney's Office both looked into it -- "in depth," apparently. Alas, Brad rattled his plastic chains for nothing: In an "informational memo" to the council's Quality of Life Committee, Assistant City Manager Forest Turner writes, "This is unenforceable by code and is civil issue between two individuals claiming ownership of the same property." Nonetheless, Brad, your courage and civic duty are duly noted and much appreciated.

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Robert Wilonsky
Contact: Robert Wilonsky