Sounds Like a Bloody Good Time

A good Friend of Unfair Park shot me a photo this week of an SUV parked in Lakewood sporting an advertisement for www.MenarcheParty.com, which helps you "Celebrate Girlhood to Womanhood." Which, of course, sent me directly to the Web site, to which the missus responded with a bemused, albeit slightly terrified, "What the hell?" Because, for those not in the know, "A menarche party can make this time easier and more meaningful for both the young lady beginning menstruation and her parents." Wonders Patrick "Buzz" Williams, "Can you invite Aunt Flow, the Party Clown?"

Turns out it's an offshoot of a Garland-based nonprofit called

Celebrate Puberty

, which also offers a "

Puberty Session

" and an "

Abstinence Session

," the latter of which includes a "unique curriculum [that] includes Interactive games and activities such as abstinence walk, Oreo, STD Detector." But I can't get past the Pin the Ovaries on the Uterus game, pictured above and something

you really must see in action

. Or the Puberty Marshmallow Game, which officially ruins my favorite hot chocolate topping forever. Still, though, we finally have weekend plans!

--Robert Wilonsky

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