Well, If Architectural Digest Thinks Calatrava Bridge Is a "Parabolic Pylon" of Virtue ...

I don't want to suggest that my wife is a sharp stick in the eye, but from time to time she does like to "point things out." To me. So this morning when I reached for the place on the bedstead where I had neatly and carefully laid out my trousers for the day, what should I find but a copy of the March 2012 Architectural Digest on top of them opened to a full-page photo of the Margaret Hunt Hill Bridge under the headline "Well Connected."

Digest senior writer Samuel Cochran describes the bridge as "the most dramatic addition to the Dallas skyline in recent memory." He calls it "a parabolic pylon" and goes on (a bit): "Laced through that soaring arc are 58 cables, some eight inches thick, which extend in weblike sweeps to either side."

He says when the bridge opens, "it will allow for easy passage between downtown and the rapidly revitalizing neighborhood of West Dallas."

Well, you know they're not allowed to say anything negative in that magazine. But, fine. OK. I never claimed to be a big architectural cognoscente. I'm like that famous rock and roll line, "Don't know much about architecture."

I do not find "weblike" in the OED as a word. So that was wrong. He could have said "web-toed." Is this small of me? Oh, I'm so terribly sorry. Just jab a sharp stick in my eye, then, why don't you?

Fine. So maybe I was wrong about the architecture of the bridge. Maybe it's OK.

Architecturally speaking, it's an OK bridge. You heard it here first.

Who the hell subscribed to Architectural Digest at my house? How much does that thing cost?

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Jim Schutze has been the city columnist for the Dallas Observer since 1998. He has been a recipient of the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies’ national award for best commentary and Lincoln University’s national Unity Award for writing on civil rights and racial issues. In 2011 he was admitted to the Texas Institute of Letters.
Contact: Jim Schutze