Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End:
*Seems Highland Park-ex and potential No. 1 overall NFL Draft pick Matthew Stafford isn't comfortable talking with teams - specifically a psychologist for the San Francisco 49ers - about his parents' divorce. It's wrong for 49ers coach Mike Singletary to go public with the tale, telling a radio station "if you're going to look at drafting a guy in the first round, and you're going to pay him millions of dollars, and asking him about a divorce about his parents, if that's going to be an issue, uhhh, then you know what, maybe he doesn't belong here." But if you're going to pay me $50 million, I'll fly my folks in and they can tell you all about it themselves.
*With one down, seven to go - Mavs win Wednesday; Jazz lose Thursday - my plan to have the Mavericks pass Utah for 7th place in the West is working to perfection. UPDATE: If you can't beat the sorry ass, 20-win Grizzlies with your nuts on the line, how you gonna sniff a win on the road in the playoffs. Sorry Mavs, but my belief stops here.
*I've said it before and I'll say it again: The most dangerous vehicle on the road is the white pickup. Fear it.
*I don't know of one person who got sick with the Conficker virus. You? Smells like a fabricated ghost story, invented to justify all those IT geeks. Kinda like how once a month the scientific community makes an "amazing discovery" which turns out to be just another star 1,000 light years away. Y2k, anyone?
*Didn't see this coming: Elvis Andrus' spring batting average (.275) was higher than David Murphy, Hank Blalock and Nelson Cruz. That's good news. I think.
*Bet my dork story can top your dork story. In college I was at the old European Crossroads club Amnizia when I confronted a hot little tart. "I went to Hockaday," she informed. Wanting to make an immediate, shallow connection, I retorted "Really? Me too!"
*Kudos to Tom Hicks for eating Frank Catalanotto's $6 million salary. He's usually an easy target unwilling to make financial sacrifices for his team, but the Rangers' owner also spent $4 million on Ballpark upgrades. Don't wake him. Maybe he hasn't heard about "these economic times ..." UPDATE: So ... a couple loosey-goosey moves and Hicks' finances go right to the shitter. He's defaulting on loans? Oh boy.
*Want to find yourself laughing, angry and recoiling in fear within the same 45 minutes? Watch the HBO documentary "Right America: Feeling Wronged." Scariest part? Could've easily been filmed down in Johnson County.
*I don't really understand wind. But I understand that I really don't like it. This week's weather offered us baseball-sized hail and 60-mph gusts. Apocalypse? Nope, Spring.
*My bracket has long been in rubble, but my champion - UConn - is still alive and well. Can I still claim to be an "expert" if my only Final Four team wins it all?
*Speaking of Hicks' bank account, the Stars missing the NHL playoffs will cost him at least $4 million. At least.
*Got stuck this morning on cancelled vs. canceled. Out of nowhere they both looked right. Weird, Webster's agrees.
*If you live in China and you're a "one in a million", you have 1,300 just like you.
*Maybe I'm going blind, but where are all the Bluebonnets? Too early?
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
*From the Dept. of If-It-Seems-Too-Good-To-Be-True-It-Probably-Is: Giggle.
*Saw where SMU football will get two "nationally televised" games in 2009. Then saw where the networks are The Mountain and CBS College Sports. Totally dismissed it.
*Because, after all, 105.3 The Fan is the official home of NASCAR, I'll only have room to squeeze in one show this weekend. Sunday 7-10 a.m. Be there or be square. Or just sleep in. I'll never know. Or ... will ... I?