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Whitt's End: 8.21.09

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Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End:

*Found this Josh Hamilton interview from Rangers' spring training. March 18, 2009 to be exact. In other words, about two months - give or take - after his full-throttle, alcohol-laden night with half-naked coeds at an Arizona bar. The interviewer is Erica Newberg, daughter of the noted Rangers' afficianado Jamey Newberg. A particular question caught my fancy. Erica: Some kids who look to you as their role model think if Josh Hamilton can do drugs and drink alcohol and still be a great athlete that they can too. What would you say to them? Josh: I think I went through it and God allowed me to come through it so I can share the story of why not to do it. I hope they don't thnk that way because everything I loved was taken away from me because of drugs and alcohol. Remind me one more time how he's not a hypocrite?

*Brett Favre coming out of retirement got me to thinking: If we could pick one Cowboy - dead, alive and/or retired - to return for one season to help the 2009 season, who would it be? For  my money, Deion Sanders. The Cowboys need help at cornerback and the gap between Deion and Orlando Scandrick is about as big as it gets. Your thoughts?

*I know C.J. Wilson's home ERA is 0.81, but I don't trust him. Maybe it's because of the leather bull whip he wears as a necklace. And what's Dustin Nippert wearing around his neck? A lei? And one of those white iPhone AV chords? Weird.

*Your Dallas Cowboys have zero depth on the offensive line and I know who to blame: Bill Parcells. How's that, you ask? Do the names Kurt Vollers, Ryan Young, Matt Lehr, Al Johnson, Torrin Tucker, Marco Rivera, Rob Petitti, Jacob Rogers and Stephen Peterman ring a bell? All Parcells' guys.

*You're not going to like this Evangelicals, so cover your ears: Rangers' draft choice Matt Purke should fire his agent. The guy was the 11th pick overall. Say he has a great two seasons at TCU and - what - moves up six spots to 5th? Is it really worth it the risk? Here's the funny part: Purke said it was God who guided his negotiations. Giggle. Guffaw. Seriously?

*For those who love the phrases "i.e.", "candidly" and "keh-boyz", Jerry Jones has begun two weekly shows on 105.3 The Fan: Tuesdays at 8:10 a.m. and Fridays at 11:10 a.m.

*The reason we watch sports? Y.E. Yang. Not that we necessarily crave the Southlake-resident-by-way-of-South-Korea PGA champion per se. But the unpredictability of sports is just so damn unique. So intoxicating.

*Hot.

*Not.

*Was reminded this week about a pitcher the Rangers could use right about now: Joaquin Benoit.

*Read recently that Reader's Digest is going bankrupt. Which begs the question: Who reads anymore? Well, except me, reading about no one reading.

*Okay, fine, I'll say it: Monogamy is damn difficult. Not impossible, I said, difficult

*Watching the kid at the Rangers' game the other night catch two foul balls - with his glove, mind you - in the same Josh Hamilton at-bat somehow gives me hope that special things are still possible in this cruel world.

*Okay, Bushies, take heart. I'm pretty sure Barack Obama is getting his ass kicked by this whole Health Care public option boondoggle. Started out as a noble effort, I believe, but at this point I sense back-pedaling, direction-changing and exasperation. Not good.

*If you haven't enjoyed Dick Cheese, you haven't lived. Ya know, Richard Cheese. The guy who turns AC/DC's "Shook Me All Night Long" into a lounge classic. He's badass. Even better, he's at House of Blues Wednesday night.

*Sometimes I'm afraid to fall asleep at night ... because I don't trust my dreams.

*Actually, strike that, I sleep like a baby. Just wanted to try and write a sentence that was all dramaticky.

*If you're tipsy in downtown and desperately in need of getting from point A to point B - oh yeah, and you're in the mood to sing your heart out - may I suggest the Karaoke Cab? You won't be disappointed.

*For those of you so intrigued, I'll be on 105.3 The Fan Monday and Thursday from 10-2 with Newy Scruggs. For those of you who don't give a damn, I'll be on anyway.

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