You Know How I Know You're Gay? You Live in Dallas.

Dallas, according to no less an authority than Time magazine, is "the lavender heart of Texas." Meaning: Yup, padnuh, we are gay. We're also Democrats; I know, same thing. How gay? This gay:

If city councilman Ed Oakley defeats former Turner Construction CEO Tom Leppert, Dallas will become the first big U.S. city to elect a gay mayor. Dallas would join Berlin and Paris as major cities led by gays. Wait--Dallas?...

Both the Dallas sheriff and the county judge -- an Old West title meaning chairman of the county commissioners -- are openly gay. The district clerk is gay too, and Dallas is home to what is said to be the largest gay church in the world, the Cathedral of Hope, which has 3,500 members, a full choir, a violinist and long-stemmed roses in the bathroom. Dallas' fund-raising dinner for the Human Rights Campaign, the Washington-based gay group, is the largest in the nation, drawing 3,300 and raising more than $1 million for HRC and local gay organizations. And according to the gay group Lambda Legal, Dallas' is the only school district in Texas that includes teachers in its antidiscrimination policies.

Turns out, even stuff not intended to be gay is gay -- like the Center for the Performing Arts downtown ("that will feature a theater designed by Ur-Euro architect Rem Koolhaas") and that infamous Trinity River bridge (to be constructed using not "a practical Army Corps plan but from a soaring design by the Spaniard Santiago Calatrava"). But, wait, having long-stemmed roses in the bathroom is gay? I just thought it was classy. --Robert Wilonsky

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