Step on a crack, break your mother's back. Avoid black cats, the No. 13 and walking under ladders. And, above all else, wear anything other than red and find yourself dead.
Hmm. Are the Texas Rangers superstitious about superstitions?
Seems to me that rituals, traditions and even obsessive compulsive disorder could reinforce routines and therefore increase performance. But aren't superstitions just a scaredy cat way of avoiding bad luck?
I'm not a superstitious guy. But I guess if I wrote three consecutive award-winning columns in my undies while eating cereal, you can damn well bet on the fourth day I'll have those boxers clean and the Raisin Bran prepped.
But your Rangers: Arrogant? Naive? Stubborn? Stupid?
Not sure which one fits most snug, but there's a reason they got swept in Detroit after sweeping Cleveland and it's not rocket science, it's primary colors. Texas won division championships wearing red in the late '90s. Brought the color back this year on a limited basis, but started 3-0 in it. So off to Detroit and - what? - blue on all three days leads to three losses and this red realization:
Superstitions in sports matter. Right?
10. #13 - Right A-Fraud?
9. Depends on Who's Doing It - Baseball players have been known to urinate on their hands to keep away slumps, callouses and good hygeine.
8. Drives 'Em Nuts - NASCAR drivers avoid peanuts in their shell? I don't even know where to begin with that insanity.
7. Premature Exaltation - No matter what your team does, don't let your post-championship parade plans leak out before the deal is sealed. Right?
6. Horseshoes are Lucky - Though, honestly, I think Peyton Manning has more to do with it than the Colts' logo.
5. Step in Line - Pitchers don't walk on the chalk baseline; Tennis players avoid stepping on the lines. Yeah, I get that one. Not sure why, but I get it.
4. The Enemy Within - Legend has it that the Mavs' Jason Terry sleeps in the shorts of the opposing team before every game. Dunno, for some reason I don't believe it.
3. Silence is Golden - You never talk to pitcher who has a no-hitter going in the 6th inning or beyond. Not that the Rangers would have any clue about this one.
2. The Beard - In hockey it's the playoff beard. For Bjorn Borg they were the Wimbledon whiskers. Whatever, "don't shave until you lose" seems to work about as good as anything else.
1. The Power of Red - All the Rangers need do is take a cue from Tiger Woods, who always wins in red on Sunday. Well, almost always.
