Girl Drink Drunk Flies Solo at Studio Movie Grill

Last installment, Girl Drink Drunk pal Jen and I were just starting our vacations (I use that term liberally as Jen wasn't really on a work vacation, but it was just so dang fun) with the Dallas International Film Festival. We'd been impressed with Multiple Sarcasms and a custom second-chance Director's Cut Martini...but then over the course of seeing 19 other movies in 10 days, we realized some of that amounted to opening night excitement.

Multiple Sarcasms was just fine, but it wasn't the best feature we'd see. And that first DCM--the one that was really syrupy and ick? -- well, it wasn't the worst drink we'd have either.

The best feature film, as far as I'm concerned anyway, was Luca Guadagnino's I Am Love starring one stunning Tilda Swinton. Now that's a girl I'd like to get a drink with. Preferably in Italy (where the film was shot). Tilda? Call me.

Best documentary? The one charting the journey of the Kashmere Stage Band's reunion, Thunder Soul. Most fun? And I think Jen would back me on this--Korean spaghetti western set in 1940s Manchuria, The Good, the Bad, the Weird. Most laughs? Texas indie Harmony and Me. Most thought provoking even days after watching it? The documentary that placed Dutch comics in North Korea for a "cultural exchange," Red Chapel. General awesomeness? The sweet and quirky Obselidia, the spiteful sibling rivalry of Lovers of Hate, and the crime family weirdness of Down Terrace. And there's more, but it's all too much to describe. Note of Lone Star pride: See all the Texas filmmakers for sure.

But what you want to know is what happened when I went to Studio Movie Grill by myself to see a thriller, right? Thought so.

Seeing as how Wake had been compared to Psycho through its creepy motel setting, I donned my hoodie with the custom Hitchcock button (because I'm a super fan) and got myself to the theater. This was Jen's day off--each of us had a day where, after days of films and the emotional journeys of those films, we crapped out in favor of house time with pets and chores and stuff--so once the theater opened I found a table near the aisle so, if it became necessary, I wouldn't have to climb out over someone I didn't know in the dark.

I was relatively new to the whole full restaurant menu/theater combo, so I asked the table next to me what was easiest to eat and as expected, burgers and pizza got the hat tip. A small margherita pizza it was. I was going to need a drink too. After all, there was a full bar and I didn't know what side of "thriller" I was sitting on.

After giving Jen the rundown on the scene over the phone I gave her my drink options and she picked for me--the DragonBerry Mojito ("new" according to the menu).  The description was Bacardi DragonBerry rum, fresh mint and lime, and so, I think it was a bit of a dare. But hey, I had more than an hour to recuperate so no harm no foul.

I remember very little from the classic TV series Dragon Tales but I do know that dragon berries aren't real. That being said, the flavor of said dragon berries as infused into my rum drink was also not real. Or, perhaps "unreal" is a better statement.

Thank God and celluloid I ordered water. It really didn't occur to me that there was no mixer listed in the drink description when I ordered it. Realistically, considering the mojito moniker, if there was a "splash" of anything in there, it was soda and there needed to be about five more. The fake berry flavor was akin to cough syrup, and not the palatable children's sort, but the prescription "we added flavor to try to mask the medicine" kind. At this point, it became clear to me the problem was, in spite of the lack of mixer, a Bacardi problem and not so much a bartender problem. The mint was barely noticeable, but I was glad it and the lime were there. Anything to cut the cloying taste of dragon spit, which is what I officially suggest for a re-naming.

I kept trying the drink, not just because I thought after it got watered down a bit it would get marginally better, but because I ran out of actual water and I didn't get a refill. Which brings me to a strange irony about Studio Movie Grill: Before movies at DIFF and otherwise, audiences are urged to silence or turn off their cell phones. At DIFF especially, we were told before every screening not to text during films so that the light from the screens didn't disturb other audience members. Totally makes sense. I support that rule. I love that rule, in fact.

What I don't love, however is that certain rows at SMG have task lighting for its servers to see and the tables don't. What did they use to run up and down our rows during the movie? Their cell phones. Had they small, directed flashlights or even floor lights, it would be awesome, but the whole issue with cell phones is the glow that invades and distracts everything around it.

With Wake busy earning itself 19th place on my ranking of watched films (there has to be a 19th, people), and my DragonBerry mojito, fortunately for me, I needed distracting.

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