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Micah Parsons Has Inflation Blues Day After Play-Off Win, and Y'All Got Jokes

Micah Parsons had some grocery shopping to do recently.
Micah Parsons had some grocery shopping to do recently. Getty Images
The day after the Dallas Cowboys sent Tom Brady packing (maybe for good) with their first road playoff win in 30 years, Micah Parsons evidently needed to pick up some things at the grocery store on the way home. The Cowboys 6-foot-3-inch linebacker had three tackles and one sack in the 31–14 win over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but if there's no bread at the house, there's still no bread.


Tuesday morning, while Cowboys fans were basking in the playoff win, Parsons took to Twitter to bemoan the price of groceries. The obvious thread is, "Oh, like he's affected." Sure. Presumably not. But not a bad way to use his platform regardless. Really, though, since when did a jar of Bonne Maman strawberry jam cost more than $7? Even peanut butter and jelly sandwiches aren't safe.

The responses to Parson's Tweet are all of us. Here are some of our favorites.

1. Addressing the elephant in the room. (Cowboys kicker Brett Maher missed four extra-point attempts against Tampa Bay, a new record).
2. Not even $22 eggs can break this mood.
3. There's a hustle for every season. Even avian-flu season.
4. Good observeration, HiddenOG. Good observation.
5. We do need to keep our eye on the ball here. Sunday is going to be tough.
6. Oh, so that's why eggs cost so much. Make sense now. 
7. Babies are soooo cute. Diapers, not so much. Welcome to parenthood, Micah.

8. Shoot your shot, Raymond. It cost zero dollars to ask a question.

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Lauren Drewes Daniels is the Dallas Observer's food editor. She started writing about local restaurants, chefs, beer and kouign-amanns in 2011. She's driven through two dirt devils and is certain they were both some type of cosmic force.

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