Cheap Bastard

Moon Wok: It's Not Bad, You Know It, It's Not Really, Really Bad

She says she wanted to try the food, but we think Cheap Bastard stopped by Moon Wok just to have an excuse to break out her fedora, single white glove and sequined ruby dancing shoes. You can find the place at 8670 Skillman St., 214-221-8888.

Times I drove by and said to myself, "Ha. Moon Wok," before actually trying the food here: 1/2 Other customers in here besides me count: 0

Moon Wok, you officially win the Naming Wok Restaurants in Dallas Wars. Many others before you have tried to name woksteraunts in Dallas, but you have bested them all (even Wok In & Out).

Moon Wok is very clean inside (happy face) but there's no actual moonwalk. (Hey, Moon Wok, GET A BOUNCE HOUSE INSIDE YOU.) They do, however, have all of your standard Americanized Chinese food options (including but not limited to chicken lo mein, Mongolian beef, crab Rangoon, super-fried-eggrolls-stuffed-with-who-cares-what-as-long-as-there's-plenty-of-sweet-and-sour-sauce-which-there-is).

There are 100 numbered dishes on this menu.

If you're looking for spicy food from Moon Wok, you need to ask for it. The food I ordered was good -- the House Special Mei Fun was a boatload of yummy rice noodles and veggies and the Mongolian beef had some serious oyster sauce up in it -- the dishes just weren't at all spicy. Not that that's surprising (or wrong for their target market), as they're in Lake Highlands (also known as Seriously You're Claiming That These Are Highlands and That's a Lake Sure Fine Hey Nice Double Stroller).

Moon Wok has several lunch specials for $4.99. (Cheap note: Order food to-go or for delivery and you'll get at least a double portion of your entree. Pretty sure when I went that I left with 20 pounds of food and technically only two entrees.) They have 2-to-5 p.m. specials. And, according to their menu, they have "the taste of Asian food." Looking for delivery? Good. Moon Wok offers delivery to many a Lake Highlander.

Does the Moon Wok kids' menu have chicken nuggets on it? Hell yeah, it does. Because shit is authentic up in here.

Moon Wok also appears to offer sushi rolls, but since none of those had any raw fish in them, I opted out. Not only is a sushi roll with cooked fish in it a waste of mouth time and stomach space, it's a shame punch straight to your dignity. Plus, "California roll" has always sounded like John Goodman anatomy to me, anyway.

KEEP THE DALLAS OBSERVER FREE... Since we started the Dallas Observer, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Dallas, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Alice Laussade writes about food, kids, music, and anything else she finds to be completely ridiculous. She created and hosts the Dallas event, Meat Fight, which is a barbecue competition and fundraiser that benefits the National MS Society. Last year, the event raised $100,000 for people living with MS, and 750 people could be seen shoving sausage links into their faces. And one time, she won a James Beard Award for Humor in Writing. That was pretty cool.
Contact: Alice Laussade