Each week City of Ate will give you the lowdown on a local happy hour in Quittin' Time, with the details on why you should or shouldn't take up the featured bar or restaurant on its drink specials.
Where: National Sports Lounge (music warning), 3606 Greenville Ave., 214-887-9500
When: 3 p.m. to 7 p.m. Monday through Friday currently; may be extended, as the restaurant has plans to serve lunch on weekdays beginning next week.
What: $2 domestic drafts, plus: $2 You-Call-Its Mondays; $3 wells, $2 domestics and $8 pitchers Tuesdays; half-price appetizers Mondays and Tuesdays; $1 select drafts and 2-for-1 burgers Wednesdays.
Why or why not: There are a few types of people who will fit right in at National Sports Lounge. If you're a dude who spikes your bleach-blond hair into a fauxhawk to deflect attention away from the freakish 'roid-induced growth of your skull, you and your Ed Hardy shirt will love NSL. And if you're the kind of girl who's willing to expose a little flesh to convince these walking clichés to buy you drinks, then you, too, will feel at home.
Otherwise, it might be a long night -- even if those are some pretty cheap drinks.
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
Though there is only one location, the money spent on sports-related decorations, a mural of hot chicks in referee outfits and a claimed 57 high-definition TV screens -- not to mention the skimpy servers' uniforms -- give NSL the look of a Hooters-esque breastaurant chain.
But you probably aren't going to see a Hooters bartender take shots with customers or let a wasted female sidle up to her behind the bar and convince her to give patrons a nipple flash. That flash of perfectly spherical man-made mammary was almost enough to absolve her from a distinct preference for favored customers; earlier in the evening, she'd ignored repeated requests for a beer and finally, after about 15 minutes, finally asked for the order again, stared blankly for a few seconds, then huffed "Is that all?"
Despite the impressive array of TV screens, the place doesn't seem to have made up its mind whether it's a sports bar or ultra-lounge. An NBA playoff game was playing on most screens, but with the sound muted in favor of a DJ's selection of club house and hip-hop. The only thing keeping it from being irredeemably generic is the large patio and its open-air bar.
If you've done enough curls, bench presses and lat pulldowns to make yourself visible to any of the tanned, teased and siliconed size-zero servers, have a blast listening to seasoned gold-diggers give sorority girls advice on discerning which of the male customers have money and which are poseurs.