Everyone has their own hangover cure they love to gush about, but they all suck. Most involve a greasy meal, something hydrating, and if you're lucky, a nap, but while they may temporarily cause the worst symptoms to abate for a short time, inevitably, you're eventually right back where you started: ready to boot.
The only hangover cure that really works is curing the malady before it even begins, and to do that you have to lay down some protective measures before you pass out. Luckily Velvet Taco has everything you need, and they're open till 4 a.m. on weekends for all of your pharmaceutical needs.
First pick an appropriate beverage from the reach-in cooler. Lament that they only have the lime flavored Topo Chico that tastes like the bad shots you've already had too many of, and opt for a large-sized Pellegrino instead.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to the Observer's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Dallas's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
Next, order a breakfast taco and some elotes.
If you're lucky the elotes will land first and coat your stomach in a lacto-basic protective barrier the folks at Pepto Bismol only wish they had thought of first. When the breakfast taco arrives, eat it with vicious enthusiasm until it's gone, and then lick any remaining grease from the brown paper that cradled the drunkard's gift from above.
If you're smart, you got No. 19 or any of the tacos with the cheddar potatoes. If you did, you already know that everything is going to be all right. Catch a cab and get to bed as quickly as possible. With any luck you'll sleep till noon and rise like the sun on a new spring day. That tequila you pounded never stood a chance.