The Perfect Dining Guide to Dallas for the St. Louis Cardinals

Dearest St. Louis Cardinals,

City of Ate heard you're heading to town to play a game or two of baseball with our Texas Rangers, and we would like to take a moment to welcome you to our fair city!! Hi!! Welcome! We like your pants!

We know that being a visitor in a new town can be extremely overwhelming. Dallas has so many fine dining establishments to offer, it can be really difficult to choose where to eat when those pesky mealtimes show up. Lucky for you, we're here to help!

Here's a list of five fantastic Dallas restaurants that will be perfect for you players. Be sure to fill up before the big games so you can play your best!

1) Pizza Hut

We know you've gotta be craving some pizza, right? Everyone loves pizza. And here in Dallas, we have the best pizza in the whole world. The best pizza for you in our town is definitely at Pizza Hut. Feast your mouth on this place. Their traditional Neapolitan pizza will blow your mind right into Italy's boobs. You would love it there.

2) Burger King

Check out Burger King for the best burger you deserve. Ask for it rare -- so, so good.

3) Bennigan's, 13350 N. Dallas Parkway

Mmm. Nothing like food from a restaurant, amiright? Order some of the food they have! It's so great!

4) Underground Trashcan Dinners

The latest trendy thing happening in Dallas is to eat 15 chocolate Ex-Lax tabs before a game for luck. You guys have to try it! When in Rome!!!

Hope you guys enjoy your time in Dallas!

Follow City of Ate on Twitter. Follow me at @thecheapbastard.

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Alice Laussade writes about food, kids, music, and anything else she finds to be completely ridiculous. She created and hosts the Dallas event, Meat Fight, which is a barbecue competition and fundraiser that benefits the National MS Society. Last year, the event raised $100,000 for people living with MS, and 750 people could be seen shoving sausage links into their faces. And one time, she won a James Beard Award for Humor in Writing. That was pretty cool.
Contact: Alice Laussade