Fort Worth is about to get a combination beer garden, arcade, music venue, dog park ... we could go on.
Fort Worth is about to get a combination beer garden, arcade, music venue, dog park ... we could go on.

Cowtown Is Getting an 'Adult Playground' With Dog Park, Beer Garden, Rooftop Bar

Apparently, good food and drinks and attentive service aren't enough in 2018 — you need stuff. Not normal restaurant things like TVs for the big game or purse hooks under the bar, oh, no. You need amenities: mini golf, an arcade, a stage for live music, a beer garden, a dog park, a massive rooftop patio overlooking an urban skyline.

A new concept called the Yard is bringing every single one of those things to Cowtown, according to a press release, and it's ... a lot.

"Fort Worth will soon be home to a one-of-a-kind 'come as you are' concept that will feature an adult playground, private karaoke room, large state-of-the-art stage for local and national touring acts, multi-level balconies with views of the stage, a beer garden offering over 70 brews and a Texas-sized rooftop patio with views of the downtown Fort Worth skyline," according to a press release.

"Because adults deserve a playground, too, the Yard will have an adult arcade with games such as Hypershoot Basketball and Lane Master Bowling, pingpong tables and a miniature golf course (available to guests at no additional charge)," the release reads. "All the fun and games are sure to work up an appetite, so a regularly rotating fleet of food trucks will always be on hand to serve up great eats in the beer garden."

The 18,000-square-foot complex will also have a fenced-in dog park with "dog toys, chews and a special doggie menu available for pups of all shapes and sizes," according to the release.

So, essentially, a bar and restaurant disguised as a miniature theme park. And since the Yard will be able to hold 1,500 people at a time, it's liable to feel an awful lot like a theme park, too.

The concept opens next month at 3017 Morton St. and will be open from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. daily. Will the food and drinks actually be good? Will it even matter? Is our inability to just eat a damn sandwich and drink a beer while making conversation with people we love a sign that the end-times are near?

Let's get together at an "adult playground" and scream overtop live Texas country music while we debate the answer. Or we can just, you know, go to a regular bar.

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