Unleash your inner Dowager Countess of Grantham at The Dallas Arboretum. The arboretum is hosting a special three-course holiday tea from now through Jan. 3. Guests will enjoy a first course of roasted chestnut soup with cheese wafer, a second course of assorted tea sandwiches and a dessert course. To attend the tea, you must be 13 years or older (because nothing spoils a good tea like a small child.) Prices range between $49 and $59 (includes Champagne) and include parking and admission to the garden. Reservations are required and can be made by calling 214-515-6511. No tea service will be held when the garden is closed on Christmas and New Year's day.
What it be: Holiday Tea
When it do: 11 a.m. Thursday, Dec. 22
Where dat is: 8525 Garland Road
Join Martin House for their first annual Festivus. The night's activities include, but are not limited to: Feats of Strength, Airing of Grievances and The Pole. The taps will be open late — until 8 p.m. — which means you can squeeze in a few extra precious minutes of drinking Christmas in July. Festivus, indeed.
What it be: Festivus
When it do: 6 to 8 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 22
Where dat is: 220 S Sylvania Ave., Suite 209, Fort Worth
You could try to remember how many lords leapt or maidens milked, or you could abandon 12 Days altogether in favor of a good, strong ale. For the ninth beer of Christmas, Denton's Bearded Monk will give to you Noble Rey Brewing Co.'s Barampus. One part anthropomorphic folklore figure, one part spiced American brown ale, Barampus will give you a gift far better than a turtle dove or even a golden ring. Barampus will give you the gift of holiday beer and a holiday-style neurochemical cascade to go right along with it.
What it be: 9th Beer of Christmas: Noble Rey's Barampus
When it do: 8 p.m. Thursday, Dec. 22
Where dat is: 122 E. McKinney St., Denton
Christmas is coming early to Community Beer Co. In conjunction with The Bearded Monk, Community will start spreading good cheer by opening their taproom early and releasing some special beers. Among them will be a one-time batch of Monk's Wheat Wine, small batch gose, Snickerdoodle Ale and Community's Macallan Barrel Aged Legion. And the best part? It doesn't matter whether you've been naughty or nice this year; the only thing Santa will be checking is your ID.
What it be: Beers Before Christmas
When it do: 3 to 9 p.m. Friday, Dec. 23
Where dat is: 1530 Inspiration Drive, Suite 200
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What's red and green and ugly as sin? Your Christmas sweater, most likely. But hey, at least there's a place where you can go and be among other ugly sweater wearers. Tupps Brewery's Christmas Sweater Party will feature live music starting at 6 p.m., OH MY KABOB food truck and a prize for the ugliest sweater. You can regale other party-goers with tales of how your aunt just won't stop knitting sweaters, no matter how many times you hide her needles, and how you secretly enjoy the feel of glitter-covered pom-poms. Admission is free.
What it be: Ugly Christmas Sweater Party
When it do: 4 to 10 p.m. Friday, Dec. 23
Where dat is: 721 Anderson St., McKinney