In honor of today's holiday (don't act like you don't know what it is, unless the boss is around) City of Ate presents a list of Ten Foods Not Traditionally Prepared With Pot That Maybe Ought To Be. The Internet is full of recipes for the old standbys of brownies or tea made with marijuana. But considering that potheads can be crafty enough to convert an apple into a pipe in a matter of seconds, we think they can do better when it comes to food, too. Here are a few suggestions.
Reese's Willie Edition. In honor of Elvis Presley's love of fried 'nanner sandwiches, Reese's created a Peanut Butter and Banana Creme cup. In honor of Willie Nelson's love of ... well, you can see where this is going.
Totinos Party Pizza. Party, indeed. And while we're on the topic of pizza, give us a weed crust over a wheat crust any time.
Doritos 28g Extreme Munchies. Come on, Frito Lay. You've made about 735 variations of the archetypal stoner snack chip and haven't thought to add weed to it yet? Surely you have customers in British Columbia, Amsterdam, California and other places where you could sell medicinal flavored corn tortilla chips.
Meatloaf. Your grandma used sage-flavored breadcrumbs to stretch out the ground beef for her famous meatloaf. We have a better idea for a filler.
Honey Buns. You might lose some of the sweetness were you to mix hash oil in with the honey, but you probably wouldn't get too many complaints.
Shrimp Scampi. Basil is what usually adds the green color and herbal flavor, but rules are made to be broken.
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Pancho's Mexican Buffet. The mass-produced Tex-Mex on the buffet line at Pancho's is barely edible without a little illicit appetite stimulation beforehand. Replacing some of the lard with pot butter would save us the trouble--and have us raising the red flag again and again.
BWT (Bacon Weed Tomato) Sandwich. The texture might not be as nice without the crispness that lettuce provides, but a bit of sauteed bud will help you forget all about that. Make the sandwich on the next suggested food for double the fun...
Toasted Toast. Pot butter is the go-to ingredients for weed-laced food. Why bother with brownies when you can just spread it on toast?
Beer. Hops are the aromatic herbs that balance the sweetness of malts in most beers. Any stoner whose ever used fresh or even compressed hops to make homebrew probably had a moment of deja vu upon catching a whiff of the fruity, piney aroma of the conical flower clusters. If only an ounce of Granddady Purp were as cheap as the ounce or two of Cascade hops required for a batch of pale ale.