We Ran Dallas’ Finest Through Google’s Portrait Matcher

Throughout the winter, much has been made about a feature in Google’s Arts and Culture app that uses an algorithm to match a user’s selfie to a piece of art from around the world. The results have ranged from amusing to terrifying, but Dallas has largely been left out on the fun. Texas’ privacy laws limit Google’s ability to collect users’ pictures, so app users in the Lone Star State don’t have access to the selfie feature.

While that isn’t any fun, the Observer is nothing if it isn’t here to serve. We’re not techno whizzes, but even we figured out that by using a free virtual private network service, we could spoof the app into thinking we weren’t in Texas. We managed to run several of Dallas’ finest through the magic selfie machine. Here, presented with out commentary, are the results. You feel free to comment, though.

1. Texas Rangers third baseman Adrian Beltre

2. U.S. Rep. Eddie Bernice Johnson

  3. Annie Clark, otherwise known as St. Vincent

4. Dallas County Commissioner John Wiley Price

5. Former President George W. Bush

6. Erykah Badu

7. Dallas Cowboys running back Ezekiel Elliott

8. Dallas City Council member Dwaine Caraway

9. Dallas Mavericks forward Dirk Nowitzki

9. Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott

  10. U.S. Rep. Pete Sessions