The Problem with Travie McCoy's "Billionaire"

What would you do if you had a million dollars? Would you buy nice cars? A nice house? Or would you be like Peter from

Office Space

and do absolutely nothing?

Unfortunately, inflation requires that you demand even more money than that to fulfill your dreams, folks. Now, we all have to want to be a billionaire--and "so fucking bad," at that.

Or so Travie McCoy requests in his new single "Billionaire."

We mostly remember Travie back when he went by "Travis" and served as the frontman of the punk-meets-rap group Gym Class Heroes--an underwhelming act, to say the least.

Apparently, this dude had a gig in Dallas last week with Cobra Starship (a disappointing name for the band since they have nothing to do with starships), and 3OH!3 (a band that makes me forget that the word douche means shower in French).

He strikes me as a guy that wants to reproduce the authenticity of alternative hip-hop--De La Soul influence and all. Problem is, he's not clever enough to break conventions like they did. He's just colorful enough to market himself to teenage mall-dwellers.

As a result, Travie ends up looking a bit like a guy at the counter of your local Urban Outfitters here. You know the type--the one with a girlfriend ten years his junior? Yeah, him. The creepy one.

As for his music? Well, this song follows in the sort of style McCoy is known for: songs with possibly unique ideas that aren't delivered with much wit. The lyrics here sound a bit like other songs that explain what the musician would do if they had a bunch of money or ruled the world. Like Nas' "If I Ruled The World" or Barenaked Ladies' "If I Had A Million Dollars."

So which is it? Does McCoy want to "free all his sons" or "buy the Elephant Man's remains"? Neither: He'd rather have a "TV show like Oprah," adopt kids like all the cool celebrities do and  "last but not least grant somebody their last wish".

One problem, though: That should be his last line. But it's not. What the hell?

Listen: Travie's bound to get a bunch of money out of his career. There's little doubt about the marketability of this stuff. But let's see if he's gonna do some of what he promises--or at least the philanthropic stuff.

Otherwise? No TV show for you!

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