This weekend, all the prophecies were confirmed. Ice fell from the sky, vehicles careened into cars and trees and off bridges, children were loosed from their schools -- all exactly as it had been written.
WFAA weather oracle Pete Delkus watched with smug satisfaction as, one by one, his predictions were confirmed. He'd always been good, but this was uncanny.
Then, in the umpteenth hour of poring over hypnotically colored weather maps, nerves frayed by a surfeit of caffeine and a massive sleep deficit, it hit him: What if those weren't just predictions. What if he was actually controlling the weather?
And so, Pete Delkus transcended mere meteorology and ascended into the pantheon.
See also: Pete Delkus Found Your Lack of Faith Disturbing and Your Sarcasm Annoying
It's hard to pinpoint the exact moment this happened, but the transformation was becoming evident by early Sunday afternoon. Note the use of the first-person pronoun in this tweet:
The thaw wont last long...we'll refreeze tonight when lows drop into the middle 20s.
— Pete Delkus (@wfaaweather) December 8, 2013Here, in what at the time seemed an act of hubris, he becomes some sort of weather event:
Love it that graphics are now being named after me!! MT @matt_marks66 @Dallas_Observer Umm......"RePete"... pic.twitter.com/hJwRMGshf8
— Pete Delkus (@wfaaweather) December 9, 2013By Sunday evening, he'd begun demanding that his followers worship him as a deity.
Ok...kiddies. Schools are closing!! Here's the latest...more to come! http://t.co/HBzGyrF3oK
Tell me now...who's your hero?!?
— Pete Delkus (@wfaaweather) December 8, 2013Another reason to love me! MT @dallasschools: All Dallas ISD schools and offices closed due to weather on Monday.
— Pete Delkus (@wfaaweather) December 9, 2013Even the Baptists are convinced:
On Icemeggedon Weekend a special appearance by @wfaaweather Pete Delkus pic.twitter.com/pTKgEkIw8E
— Jack Graham (@jackngraham) December 8, 2013Send your story tips to the author, Eric Nicholson.
