Texas Motor Speedway Announces 2012 Schedule. In Style.

As I've written before, nobody throws a party like Texas Motor Speedway grand poobah Eddie Gossage.

He added to his legacy again Tuesday night at Gilley's south of downtown Dallas, unveiling his track's 2012 schedule with a party featuring Kurt Busch, Kyle Petty, Matt Kenseth, sword swallowers, stilt-walkers, Stoney LaRue and more hot women than you'd could shake your a stick at.

Oh yeah, and a customized new song from Foreigner.

Bottom line: NASCAR will arrive at Fort Worth for the Samsung Mobile 500 April 12-14 and for the AAA Texas 500 November 1-4, sandwiched around the IRL Firestone Twin 275s June 7-9.

Also among the featured attractions next year ...

A concert by Trace Adkins and professional bull riding in the mammoth track's infield.

Aside from the gaggle of gorgeous girls auditioning to win this prestigious role at TMS, last night's main course was an alcohol-influenced round table (in recliners, mind you) in which Petty slur-asked for audience "precipitation" and then Kenseth, Busch and Kenny Wallace decided to jump remote-controlled trucks over a make-shift ramp into ...

Wallace's 47th birthday cake.

Touche, Eddie. Well played.

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