The photo exploded on Twitter, turning Lee into a meme and teen heartthrob all rolled into one title: #AlexFromTarget. The spike in attention he received from the media and newfound fans was drastic, to say the least.
Lee appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, Target uniform and all. He provided a bashful and bewildered recollection of his rise to fame, accepted a custom sweatshirt as a gift from Degeneres and received screaming cheers from women in the audience who appeared to be at least twice his age.
Ample opportunities to pursue acting, music and charity work sprang from being #AlexFromTarget. But these things were hard to enjoy when, as he told The New York Times in 2014, he was afraid to leave his house. Lee, his family and his then-girlfriend were subjected to harassment, doxxing and threats.
Of course, all of this was intended as a compliment. People just thought this teenage boy was cute and since his likeness was now beyond his control and the property of social media lore, they were entitled to express that any way they saw fit.
Today, Lee not only has zero social media presence, he’s gone completely off the grid. He’s now in his mid-20s and there’s almost no information on him past his teen years. The media has revisited the topic from time to time, but no outlet has been able to get a comment from him in years.
Coming off the massive digital footprint he left a decade ago, Lee seems to have developed a knack for covering his tracks. We can’t say we blame him.
#AlexFromTarget caused a media frenzy in 2014, but Lee’s story is replicated on almost a daily basis in 2024. Every time we leave the house, we have zero guarantee that some idiot with a smartphone won’t think we’re cute, cringe or in some way abnormal enough to justify filming and sharing to social media.
In 2022, an Australian named Harrison Pawluk approached an older woman sitting alone at a mall table and handed her a bouquet, leaving her visibly surprised. We know that all of this happened because he filmed the whole thing and uploaded it to TikTok.
The caption to Pawluk's video read, “I hope I made her day better.” The assumption, of course, is that she was lonely and sad sitting in public by herself. Not that he could know for sure, though. He didn’t ask.
The video went on to accrue millions of views and thousands of likes and comments, many of which praised the video’s wholesome nature. The woman in question felt dehumanized.
"He interrupted my quiet time, filmed and uploaded a video without my consent, turning it into something it wasn't,” the woman anonymously told ABC Radio Melbourne. “I feel like he is making quite a lot of money through it.”
Pawluk maintains that he means well with his work, which he describes as depicting “random acts of kindness.” Not every TikTok creator has kindness on their minds when making public content.
Last year, a TikTok influencer named Ana Moreira posted a video of herself dancing in her seat at an IHOP as a server sets a stack of pancakes in front of her. “My hangryness leaving my body the moment I have my food,” read a block of text on the screen.
In the background, a woman at another table is casting Moreira a look that could be read as judgmental, but you probably didn’t notice her. Not unless you read Moreira’s caption, that is: “The best part of this video is the woman judging me,” Moreira wrote, adding a #humor to underscore the silliness of it all.@addictedtoana The best part of this video is the woman jugding me #humor ♬ Cupid – Twin Ver. (FIFTY FIFTY) – Sped Up Version - sped up 8282
The video blew up on TikTok, and not because the app came together over a shared love of pancakes. Thousands of commenters and other creators raced to give their own analysis of the anonymous woman’s brief, wordless reaction.
“I will never understand why people get irritated at other people’s happiness,” read one comment.
Others sided with the woman in the background, saying they would have reacted the same way to Moreira’s behavior. “I’m definitely the girl in the back,” another commenter wrote. “Like, ma’am, this is an IHOP.”
Moreira went on to create a follow-up video, zooming in on the woman’s reaction with the onscreen caption, "POV [point of view]: when a customer that came after you gets their food first.” We’re assuming this was an attempt at empathy on Moreira’s part, but the damage had already been done. She had filmed a complete stranger without consent and made her an unwitting character in her content.
Weird and Rude
Is dancing in public weird? Is glaring at strangers rude? These were the questions at the center of the discourse about this video, but neither of them mattered. When there’s a camera in the equation, all bets are off. Filming strangers in public and putting them on blast to millions of followers will always be weirder and ruder than whatever they did.And, yes, we do mean whatever they did.
The stranger in the background of Moreira’s video was luckier than some. She had defenders, people who found her relatable. Viral notoriety has been used as a form of vigilante justice in the past, and the outcomes have had considerably less #humor.
The story of the Houston Astros Mean Girls began, as most of these stories do: with an influencer filming themselves in a public space.
Jackie La Bonita is a Texas-based influencer with almost 700,000 followers on TikTok. Last May, she attended a Houston Astros home game and took the opportunity to create some content. In the background of a since-deleted video she posted, two younger girls are laughing at her and flipping off the camera.
“Watch my confidence disappear after these random girls make fun of me for taking pics,” the text on the video read.
The video's hashtags included #meangirl and #meangirlenergy. Photobombing is certainly not very nice, but we can think of meaner things.
We think it’s mean to film content in public and get mad when the public doesn’t respond to being filmed without consent the way you want them to. We think it’s pretty mean to put random people on blast to thousands of followers online rather than handle it with them directly, especially when they’re sitting directly behind you. We also think it’s mean to harass and threaten people (which is what La Bonita’s followers did) over a situation that doesn’t affect you and for which you don’t have the full context.
The "mean girls" later released an apology video, claiming they were simply caught off guard to see themselves in the background of this person's content. You don't have to like how they chose to respond, but you can't say they didn't have the right to feel the way they did about being filmed without permission.
What the girls did in the background of La Bonita’s video was defined by her fans as bullying. What the internet did in response, threatening them and their families and trying to get them fired from their jobs over a middle finger and some snickering, was "justice."
In the public court of the internet, humiliation and fear are a one-size-fits-all punishment. Whether you’re a “Karen” chewing out a grocery store employee or a person being stopped for an impromptu interview on the street, there is no crime greater than not reacting the way the internet wants you to.
Even if the person’s behavior is objectively out of line, the punishment handed down by social media will always be disproportionate.
As far as the influencers go, we understand that part of their livelihood involves making videos in public. But unless they’ve gotten some kind of permit, there will always be other people around when they’re filming. The onus is on the creator to be respectful and courteous to the people around them, not on the public to make space for them.
Fitness influencer Natalee Barnett set out to create a new standard last year by releasing a video that shows her informing her fellow gym rats that she was about to start filming and asking if they were OK with being in the background. Many were fine with it, but if anyone wasn’t, Barnett would pack up and move rather than ask others to.
Barnett’s video is a demonstration of how easy this can all be. If you have the confidence to film yourself in public and perform for everyone around you, you should have no trouble approaching people and make sure they're comfortable with it or confronting someone you feel is disrespecting you. Opting out of communication and choosing instead to humiliate strangers is self-centered, cowardly and, above all else, mean.@nataleebfitness last girl is my fav🧡🧡🧡 #fyp #gymtok ♬ original sound - nataleebfitness
As for pulling out your phone and snapping a pic of a stranger in public for no reason other than thinking they’re cute, we have a more cut-and-dried answer as to whether that’s OK: Absolutely not.
Maybe we didn’t learn from what we did to Alex Lee in 2014, but it’s not too late to course correct. If someone wants to be famous online, they can pull out their phones and do it themselves. Don't make that choice for them.
