The 20th day of every April is a unifying holiday. A day when college professors and Jack in the Box employees can come together to stare blankly at an episode of Sanford and Son. A day when weekend dads and their estranged children can bond inappropriately. A day when white people wear those fake Rastafarian wigs until they’re reminded it’s never OK to put one on.
Just because it’s a happy day doesn’t mean it can’t be a dangerous day. To maximize your 4/20 enjoyment, here are some pro tips: If a man with a burly mustache asks you for some Mary Jane, that’s a cop. Pretend everyone’s a cop. If your mom asks you how your day is going — cut her off mid-sentence, she’s probably wearing a wire. Everything’s a trap and no one can be trusted.
But if you’re looking for some things to do to celebrate 4/20, print out this list and refer to it later when you forget you put it in your pants pocket.
2625 Main St. (Deep Ellum)
11 a.m. to 2 a.m.
Deep Ellum’s BrainDead Brewery might specialize in beer, but that doesn’t stop them from hosting their annual 4/20 celebration. A new design has been created for their annual T-shirt sale, and the kid-friendly tie-dye T-shirt station makes this one of the only 4/20 parties you can go to where CPS won’t get involved after.
DJ Leo J will be taking care of the music while BrainDead takes care of the food. The specialty item on the menu is the smoked and roasted cochinita pibil, with an assist from Sugar Fang Vegan Bakery providing the 4/20-themed treats. All of this is advertised alongside 4/20 giveaways and a “toast toast” scheduled for, when else, 4:20 p.m.
Eat Like a Family of Four at Golden Corral
Multiple locations in DFW
There are some days when quantity takes higher priority than quality and 4/20 definitely fits this description. If you do the math correctly, one flat rate plus as many plates as you want equals eating like a king. Every other meal before this you were sitting at the kid’s table; today you become an adult. Want to put soft serve in a taco shell? Go wild. Your dad’s not here, put sprinkles on it if it makes you smile. Make a pizza with gummy bears and chicken legs. No one’s going to stop you because they don’t get paid to care, they get paid to refill the meatloaf tub next to the corn dog basket.
420 with DFW NORML
River Bottoms Pub
7920 Randol Mill Road, Fort Worth
2 p.m. to 8 p.m.
Promising games, prize drawings and live music, the DFW chapter of NORML is inviting everyone out to support the movement to legalize marijuana. Local vendors will set up shop to browse in between listening to speeches from the activists working on reforming the laws that criminalize pot use. If this is a cause you’re passionate about, proceeds from 420 with DFW NORML will go to the nonprofit organization, funding future endeavors NORML chooses to pursue.
420 Film Fest at Gas Monkey Live
Gas Monkey Live
10110 Technology Blvd.
Tickets $4.20 to $420
Ages 18 and up
Doors at 4 p.m.
Movies and … things you do on 4/20, go together like peanut butter and literally anything else. With that in mind, Gas Monkey Live is hosting a double feature of stoner favorites, Pineapple Express and Half Baked. These movies are great on their own, so just imagine what could be done with a certain “assistance” to view them. It should be noted this is one of the few events happening the day after 4/20, so it’s perfect for anyone who remembers it’s 4/20 a day late.
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It wouldn’t be an event without vendor booths, DJ sets and a “joint-rolling contest.” A joint can mean many things, so interpret what you will from the description. Tickets range from $4.20 for general admission to an outright hilarious $420 for a 10-person cabana with a bottle selection from Gas Monkey’s VIP bottle list. If you pay $420 to watch two movies that play on basic cable, congratulations on being a drug dealer.
4th annual 420 Fest: Stoner Girl Edition
The Green Elephant
5627 Dyer St.
4/19/19 7 p.m. to 2 a.m.
Tickets start at $10
For those who can’t wait until 4/20, on the 19th The Green Elephant is the site of the 4th annual 420 Fest: Stoner Girl Edition. Grab a bite to eat and check out the advertised fire acts, live art and body painting.
Organized by Dallas smoke shop Royal Hemps, the 420 Fest is largely focused on the music. Any style that fits your taste should hit the stage throughout the evening, offering selections from DJ sets to acts like GAVLYN, WolfBaby and Dana Harper.