Silent Stupidity

So this old couple buys a house. Not just any couple, mind you. They’re not directly related, but you treat them like family. Check on them almost every day. Make every effort to buy what they’re selling, injecting income and enthusiasm to make their ends meet happily ever after. Not…

Like Father, Like Son

If pedigree is any indication, the Frisco RoughRiders baseball franchise is headed in the right direction. The Texas Rangers Double-A affiliate has promoted Scott Sonju to the prestigious role of president/general manager. If that name rings a wind chime in your vast noggin, it should. Scott’s dad is Norm Sonju,…

New Cowboys Voice

You heard it here first: Charlie Waters just accepted the job to be the analyst on Dallas Cowboys radio broadcasts for next season. Waters, an All-Pro safety with the team in the 1970s, will be Brad Sham’s partner on KTCK 1310 AM The Ticket beginning with this summer’s pre-season schedule…

Getting Defensive

That chirping Valley Ranch birdie tells me today that Dallas Cowboys defensive end Greg Ellis is unhappy and skipping off-season workouts in an attempt to force his way out of town. Ellis, the team’s first-round pick in the 1998 draft, doesn’t fit the mold of coach Bill Parcells’ 3-4 defensive…

L.A. Makes Pass in Dallas

The mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villaraigosa, is in town today, along with some other elected L.A. officials, to meet with 11 NFL team owners who’ve come to Dallas to see just where Cowboys owner Jerry Jones buried coach Bill Parcells. (What? You say he’s still alive? Then just where…

On the Mark

I loves me some Mark Cuban. Those of us who endured the Dallas Mavericks’ failed “Three J’s” era and countless snoozefests at Reunion Arena appreciate the extreme makeover he’s performed on the franchise, on and off the court. The Mavs are on their way to a second-round showdown with the…

Mocking the Draft

Lowndes Shingler. John M. Longmeyer. Lou Cioci. Stop me when you’ve heard of one…Bill Van Burkleo. Sonny Utz. Drawing a blank? Of course you are. Join the clueless crowd. Because despite what geeks like Mel Kiper and Gil Brandt and Norm Hitzges and some eighth-grader with a Web site in…

Marty Needs a Good Yanking

The old hockey adage is that in the Stanley Cup playoffs, teams need their goalies to play extraordinarily well–to “stand on their heads.” At this point, the Dallas Stars just need Marty Turco to save face. Already down 0-2 to the Colorado Avalanche in their best-of-seven playoff series, the Stars’…

Hog…Wild?

Writing in the Austin American-Statesman today, sports columnist Kirk Bohls says the annual University of Texas-University of Oklahoma game at the Cotton Bowl is damned near a done-gone deal: “‘I think it’s 80-20 that Texas will leave,’ said someone with connections to both Texas and the Cotton Bowl…Barring a change…

The Giant General

It was Don Nelson who set the table and prepared the food for your Dallas Mavericks. But it’s been Avery Johnson who’s taught them how to eat. Johnson, known as the Little General for his short stature and stern disposition, will receive the NBA’s Coach of the Year award before…

Street Cred or Straight Creep?

News that SMU will hire Matt Doherty to be its next basketball coach comes with a mixed message. Bravo: Doherty is a Dean Smith starter kit who jump-started flatlining programs at Notre Dame and Florida Atlantic. Bullshit: Doherty is a spoiled brat with anger management issues who resigned at North…

Sixty Down, 16 to Go

The Dallas Mavericks started the season with a broken-down Doug Christie, flirted late with signing has-been Shawn Kemp and gave extended minutes all the way through to isn’t-yet Rawle Marshall. Key guard Devin Harris only played seven games after the All-Star break. Keith Van Horn was injured more often than…

No Stars Gazing

If you drive near the American Airlines Center you can’t miss the giant banners featuring the Dallas Stars’ Stanley Cup quest and star Mike Modano. But if you subscribe to Dish Network, you will miss the NHL’s Western Conference Finals, likely a showdown between your Stars and the rival Detroit…

American Idols

It’s a hot, wind-warped day at the Dallas Cup Youth Soccer Tournament in Frisco, and a team of 13-year-old boys has just administered a 6-0 ass-kicking. As they jubilantly leave Pizza Hut Park, the group of players and their supporters happens upon a gaggle of barely legal girls. Fit, flirty…

Billy and the Jets

Coming soon to the Dallas Cowboys’ roster…Joe Namath? Granted, with the way ol’ Broadway Joe is struh-guh-liiiing these days, it’s a bit far-fetched. But considering coach Bill Parcells’ fascination with has-beens who once played in New York, all a player needs to wear a star on his helmet is some…

Be Proud, Then Rowdy and Loud

Why? Because thanks to your votes and the celebrity votes (who knew Billy the Kidd had good taste in music?) on TexasGigs.com’s Mavs Playoff Song Contest, our pick PPT (which consist of local faves Pikahsso, Picnic and Tahiti) won with their infectiously rawkus tune “We’re Rowdy, Proud and Loud.” Listen…

Deep Thoughts

A little Valley Ranch birdie chirped to me this morning that, in addition to former All-Pro safety Charlie Waters, the Dallas Cowboys will interview former deep snapper and SMU alum Dale Hellestrae to be their new radio analyst. With Babe Laufenberg’s voluntary departure, the Cowboys need an entertaining voice who’s…

Punching His Ticket

Two years ago, when Dale Hansen renegotiated his contract at KTCK-AM (1310, The Ticket), he was shocked by the offer. “In all honesty,” Hansen says now, “it was way too high.” Hansen, the longtime WFAA-Channel 8 sports anchor with the giant ego and the big brain, took a portion of…

Root, Root, Root for the Home Team

The Texas Rangers have played 13 games. It’s the equivalent of the Dallas Cowboys having just gone into overtime in their season opener. So should those of us who care about the local baseball team be as miserable after the 5-8 start, especially before the just-concluded trip to Oakland, as…

Saddle Up

Lone Star Park opened its 10th season of racing last night, but judging by the horse racing coverage in The Dallas Morning News, a rat peed on cotton somewhere in Grand Prairie. Ten years, folks—at a time when horse racing is struggling to survive as a spectator sport in various…

America’s (Broadcast) Team

With the re-signing of legendary play-by-play voice Brad Sham and sideline reporter Kristi Scales, we all assumed the return of Dallas Cowboys’ radio color commentator Babe Laufenberg was a slam dunk. We were wrong. Next season the Cowboys will have a new radio home on KTCK-AM (1310, The Ticket) and…

Hapless on the Hilltop

OK, so let’s hear it. It’s been a week since SMU fired basketball coach Jimmy Tubbs and promised the reasons went far beyond the wrist-slap NCAA violations of buying players hamburgers and lending them cups of laundry detergent. If there’s more to the story–and there’d better be–it’s time for outgoing…