In a recent chat with our Amy Silverstein, Dallas City Councilman Philip Kingston described the outcry over proposed cuts to Dallas Animal Services -- and the public jockeying among departments for additional funding -- as "absolute theater."
But c'mon. An online petition and a get-together at Lee Harvey's? That hardly qualifies as theater. For that, we turn to Friends of the Dallas Public Library board members Patti Clapp and Karen Blumenthal.
Blumenthal and Clapp showed up at City Hall on Wednesday, dressed, naturally, as Thing 1 and Thing 2 of The Cat in the Hat fame, to offer a decidedly Seussian plea for more robust library funding:
Hello City Council, we're Thing 1 and Thing 2, We live in Dallas, and we need things to do.
But the budget you have, such a sad sight to see, Cutting swimming and arts and recreation that's free.
And the libraries -- oh the libraries! -- such a sorry situation, The budget's so low, it's the worst in the nation. What a shame! What a crime! What a humiliation!
The doors would be open if we lived in Allen, Rowlett, or even in Plano, But the hours here -- a mere 40 per week -- that's just insano!
Honestly, dear friends, what could be more righter, Than materials, outreach, and classes to help make us all brighter.
I know what to do! I've seen the light! Let's go make trouble! Let's go pick a fight. What else can you do after school or at night?
Stop Thing 2 you're making me dizzy. But Thing 1, we have so many police, we must keep them busy.
Sirs and madams we want a city well-run, One that's clever, and smart, and a place to have fun
And here's how you start: To improve our brain powers, We need Sundays and Mondays to have library hours. And we need some real green for services and classes to make us more keen.
Just 1 percent of your budget, a mere 10 million, Will serve all of us Things and pay off in zillions
So when you're doing your figuring, think of Thing 1 and Thing 2, And remember what happens when there's nothing to do.
The gauntlet has been thrown down, and Chief Brown's "we're-driving-fewer-miles" schtick is no longer going to cut it. Time to put on some tap shoes.
Send your story tips to the author, Eric Nicholson.