Apparently, the Dallas Police Department is none too thrilled with how info is being disseminated about tomorrow's St. Patrick's Day Parade and Party along Greenville Avenue; what -- this wasn't as clear as green beer? Which is why Senior Corporal Kevin Janse, the department's spokesman, forwarded a memo First Assistant Chief Charles Cato sent to Assistant City Manager Ryan Evans, who's over Public Safety, in which the chief outlines what -- exactly -- the DPD will be on the lookout for Saturday.
The chief's memo follows. But in case you still have questions, Janse's got this to say:
There has been a considerable amount of misinformation disseminated over the last few days, especially on some blogs sites, regarding how the Dallas police department intends to address alcohol issues tomorrow at the St. Patrick's festivities on and around Greenville Avenue. ... In short, anyone observed actually consuming an alcoholic beverage outside the permitted event area is likely to be cited. Mere possession of an open container will not, in and of itself, lead to a citation or arrest.
On a related note, it is important to remember that anyone who drinks to the point of being a danger to himself or others is subject to arrest for public intoxication. Further, we strongly suggest that anyone who has consumed any quantity of alcohol not drive afterwards. Please ask all your listeners not to ruin their lives or the lives of others by driving while under the influence of alcohol.
We ask all Greenville visitors as well to respect the property of homeowners in the area. It is not fair or right to use other people's yards, cars, fences, or any public property as a trash dump or restroom. Together we can balance the interests of party-goers and property owners and keep this event safe and fun.
I'm drunk already.