Vera “Velma” Hernandez
Audio By Carbonatix
Don’t let all the churches fool you, the city’s fascination with all things kinky is one of our best-kept secrets, though it doesn’t take long before newcomers figure out their neighborhood is rife with swingers. Dallas knows how to get down. And you don’t have to wait until the annual Fetish Ball spurred by the aptly named alternative nightclub The Church to get tied down to a cross; you can be bound and gagged year-round if you know where to go.
We’re not here to pretend like this is breaking news. Dallas has loads of members-only swingers clubs. Most of them are equipped with the standard bowl of rubbers and a couple of mattresses, making them great for exhibitionists dipping their toes into the freak-o-sphere. But for the advanced, looking for a place to play with all the toys and gadgets you could imagine, you’ll have to find a more tailored experience.
Dallas’ primary dungeon, the DFW Dungeon, hosts weekly events ranging from kinky yoga to Dungeons and Dragons (DnD … and D). But maybe you’d like to keep your sadomasochism between you and your submissive. In that case, not everyone in Dallas has millions of dollars to build a custom 50 Shades of Grey-style dungeon with a wall of whips and prods, though there are plenty who do in our fine city of fortunate freaks.
For those who can’t yet soundproof a windowless room with stain-resistant flooring and wall-to-wall mirrors, Dallas has quite a few rentable dungeon options, and even one that comes to you, pun intended. All of these spaces are available by appointment only, and typically staged out of an Airbnb, although we can’t imagine that’s why the City Council was considering when they tried to ban short-term rentals three years ago. Without further ado, here’s where you can rent a cage for the night without having to drop thousands on a sexy sidequest.
Lock & Key, Alternative Bed and Breakfast
Lock & Key is a rentable kink space near Downtown Dallas. The space — $100 per hour or $500 for the night — comes with a spanking bench, a leather swing, a massage table and more. The space is curated by local dominatrix Miss Sweet and guarantees privacy. If you’re into suspension, the space even has a hook and provided ropes. Now that’s what we call hospitality.
Dom to Your Door, Curbside Dungeon Service
We live in an era of convenience. In mere hours, you can have whatever your heart desires delivered to you, including a dungeon. The Mobile Dungeon, a fully converted RV, will park in your driveway for two hours for $200, with additional delivery fees. The bus features state-of-the-art kink technologies, including a holding cell and a handcrafted, custom-built stomping table for those who enjoy a good ball-busting experience. You can even take the bus on a joyride for a city tour you’ll likely never forget.
The Texas Boudoir SpaHome, Naturalist Retreat
Ever see an Airbnb and think, “What a strange mirrored ceiling in the bedroom?” Get a load of this rental property located in Northwest Dallas. We’re not calling it a kink den; it’s more the perfect destination for a holistic wellness stay-cation. Enjoy full-body redlight therapy in one of the home’s relaxing swings designed to deeply stretch your hip flexors. Or oil up in a nice massage after taking a dip in the indoor pool and hot tub. And don’t mind the picture of feet and the men in assless chaps on the wall. Or do, if that’s what’s speaking to you. The home, with 8-foot fences surrounding the backyard, is around $715 a night.
