Quite frequently I am at a party with food, cocktails and music and think to myself, “This party is missing something. Something very big and very important.” So, I go through the checklist: food, check; cocktails, check; music, check; zoo animals…and then it hits me. That’s it: This party is…

What do you get if you take Twelve Monkeys, subtract Brad Pitt and nine of the monkeys, and substitute Turkish for the English? Three Monkeys, of course, the latest film by Turkish director Nuri Bilge Ceylan. And where can you see this picture, which involves a love triangle and won…

The incredible and talented Mr. Ben Folds has been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. When someone first put “Brick” on a mixtape for me, I suddenly understood what love was and how much that stuff was gonna bring me down someday. When I…

It must be weird to have the same name as someone famous. I don’t deal with this issue because my name is unique and special, but I do know a chick named Aimee Mann. Or, take Paul Greco, for example, an artist whose work is part of the (free!) exhibit…

If you’ve ever been to Lee Harvey’s, 1807 Gould St., you’ve probably met Bacon, the bar cat. I just hope he ain’t around come Sunday ’cause it’s Dog Day from 6 to 8 p.m., which means the place will be crawling with canine companions. The Humane Society of Dallas County…

I wonder if it’s easier or harder to get people to like your stand-up when you’re most famous for playing a villain in a wildly successful ’80s movie. My first thought was easier because of name recognition and claim-to-fame and all that stuff. But on the other hand, I don’t…

I’m not afraid to admit that I’m sometimes a slow learner. A very slow learner even. (Spoiler alert: I still can’t do fractions.) But my personal issues with math problems aside, let me tell you: I sure as hell know what a conjunction is. And the only reason for that…

The one time I visited FunAsia, 1210 E. Belt Line Road in Richardson, it was a magical evening. I watched a film about a special little dyslexic boy who talked to dancing cartoon fish while I feasted on vegetable samosas and mango ice cream. Plus, the films have an intermission!…

Some random person on the Internet once said, “Grad school is like poker. If you don’t know who the patsy is, it’s you.” Well, I know who the patsy ain’t. It ain’t any of the studio art grad students whose art is being displayed as part of the new exhibit…

When I think of the song “Kumbaya,” I think of a nerdy guy with a guitar, trying to be all over-the-top fake nice. But the song actually has its roots in an important culture–Gullah. And I’m not talking about a fictional place that’s home to giant yellow frogs named Binyah…

For the life of me, I just cannot keep plants alive. Hope, yes, but plants, no. However, if I could garden, I’d definitely be down for growing some sort of herbs. Herbs are good for you, they spice up any dish you whip up, and they’re totally legal to grow…

Sometimes, after a long, hard day, I just want to snuggle under the covers with a puppy and have someone read me a story. And, come on, deep down, everyone–no matter how old or how hip or how masculine–just needs someone to read them a story. That’s why the Semyans’…

What do star-shaped creatures, a mandala made from a plastic bag, a bunch of brightly colored monofilament line, entropy and the Internet have in common? Well, they’re all parts of the Halloween costume I’m planning for this year, but more important, they’re all elements or concepts of works by the…

The film Slumdog Millionaire didn’t go over so well in my world. I was excited to see it, and I liked it and all, but then my stupid boyfriend and I had a huge fight over whether or not we should stay in the theater to watch the big choreographed…

According to Wikipedia, source of all wisdom in the universe, Jean Dubuffet was “one of the most famous French painters and sculptors of the second half of the 20th century.” Seems like a few too many prepositional phrases to me, but OK, sure. Also, the guy’s last name makes me…

When you have a job as a receptionist, there are certain things you have to learn to live with. You get used to phones ringing off the hook, fax machines malfunctioning and angry clients yelling. But no matter how good you become at your job, something always comes along to…

When I heard a description of the latest film showing at the Modern Art Museum of Fort Worth (3200 Darnell St.) as part of the Magnolia at the Modern series, I thought to myself, “That could just as easily describe the Mexican film Y Tu Mama Tambien.” Listen to this:…

If there’s one good thing to be said for elementary school, it’s gotta be all the diorama-making that goes on up in there. I remember a diorama I made about Australia one time, with a tiny koala statue and everything. It was amazing. But then I grew up, and as…

Nine months from now, I’ll be celebrating my 25th birthday, and you can bet I’ll do it in style. Picture this: a round or two of bingo down at the local bingo hall, followed by some seriously delicious chips and salsa over at Chili’s. And, to end the night right,…

“I just wanna say one word to you. Just one word. Are you listening? Plastics.” Need I say more? Need I even mention the original MILF, Anne Bancroft? Or Dustin Hoffman banging on the glass in the church while shouting, “ELAINE! ELAINE! ELAINE!” over and over and over? No. Because…

I know what your deal is. Not to scare you, but I’ve figured out your deepest, darkest desire, hidden in the teeniest, tiniest corner of your heart: You just wanna dance. And I’m here to tell you it’s OK. What you’re feeling is completely natural. The solution to your problem…

Fender benders: We’ve all had them. One time I spotted a choice parking spot and threw my car into reverse, only to slam directly into a Volvo that had been patiently waiting behind me to grab the same space. We each got out of our respective vehicles, surveyed the damage,…