At least, that’s what Dallas Cowboys’ wide receiver wants you to think as tries to ingratiate himself to a community more inclined to remember him as the dude who took a figurative dump on the Texas Stadium star during his days as a trouble-makin’ Philadelphia Eagle. Says here on his…
I know what you’re thinking. Is the TAKS test really that hard? Who the hell is Jimmy Hoffa? How did the refs not call a foul on San Antonio’s Tony Parker for clearly grabbing a handful of Dirk Nowitzki’s jersey on the potential series-winning tip at the buzzer? And, hmmm,…
You can get Cialis at the front door. Unlimited alcohol inside. There are girls with low-cut tops, high-rise skirts and flexible morals. Guys prowl in spikes and collars. Everybody has a cell phone, set on vibrate. Balls are getting wet. And everywhere you look: swingers. But this ain’t no party,…
So how is it exactly that a baseball team can blow a 9-0 lead? Marijuana muffins, you say? Dude, I’ve got one even better. Texas Rangers. Nuff said. Well, actually, let’s say a little more because last night at Yankee Stadium your Rangers made history. Texas led the Yankees 9-0…
And learn David Hasselhoff’s “Looking For Freedom,” the Knight Rider’s 1989 “hit” credited with, oh, tearing down the Berlin Wall. (Well, that’s what Hasselhoff says.) Now, it’s being touted as the reason Nowitzki’s such a clutch free-throw shooter: The Mav says here that when he’s at the charity stripe, “I…
Eva’s head on a stick would distract anyone, especially Tony Parker. Richie Whitt makes brief mention of this below, but I wanted to note an important momentum swing in last night’s “holy crap, not another heart attack” down-to-the-wire Mavs victory–when Tony Parker missed two key overtime free throws for the…
I went to the American Airlines Center Monday night and was reminded why we love sports: because for three heart-stopping, adrenalin-pumping hours, we forgot about the first ex-wife, the second mortgage and the four tires that need rotating. Mavs 123, Spurs 118 had everything. Villains (Tim Duncan) setting traps. Turncoats…
In case you weren’t too mesmerized by that enthralling Brett Wetterich-Trevor Immelman showdown at the Byron Nelson, you might have caught Mavs-Spurs Game 3 Saturday night. If so, your heart is probably still racing. And your fist is probably still landing air punches aimed at Jerry Stackhouse. In this series…
Yes, Avery Johnson can coach. But let’s not allow the Dallas Mavericks coach to cut in line in front of Red Auerbach just yet. Johnson, the NBA’s Coach of the Year, is getting canonized for his injection of Devin Harris into the starting lineup before Game 2 of Dallas’ Western…
The annual EDS Byron Nelson Golf Classic gets underway today at the Four Seasons Resort and Club in Las Colinas. For some guys, it means putting on your golf spikes, acting like dorks and watching golf all day. For the rest of us, it means somehow finagling a coveted badge,…
LeBron James was fathered by an ex-con. Alison Eastwood’s hotness somehow evolved from Dirty Harry. Luke Skywalker’s lineage is directly traced to the unholy sperm of Darth Vader. George W. Bush is…OK, extraordinarily bad example. And, in the tradition of conquering rotten roots, the San Antonio Spurs’ founding father was…
We thought the Mavs’ owner was being unusually quiet this time of year. Guess we were wrong. Though, by Mark Cuban’s standards, this seems like pretty lame stuff, no? But is that really worth $200,000? –Richie Whitt…
Went to my 9-year-old son’s baseball game in McKinney last night and came away with two revelations: We really shouldn’t name our sports teams after natural disasters, and people, even coaches, are stupid. You’ve heard all the uproar and NCAA mandates that universities no longer use “Indians” or variations of…
Dirk had best nut up for tonight’s Game 2 against the San Antonio Spurs. Dirk Nowitzki is a great player, but if the Dallas Mavericks star keeps passing up crucial shots, he’ll never be an elite player. Dirk missed eight of 11 shots in the second half of the Game…
The woman’s voice on the other end of the line is strong and perky: “You’ve reached the national headquarters of the Continental Baseball League,” she says, as though you’ve just dialed a proud, tradition-rich enterprise. But at the moment, the Continental Baseball League doesn’t exist apart from its offices on…
When is no news conference news? When the No. 16-ranked high-school basketball prospect in the country decides he isn’t quite ready to tell folks where he’s going to school. (Same thing happened to me; I get it.) That’s what happened today when power forward Darrell Arthur of South Oak Cliff…
Now George Dubya done gone and pissed off a whole new constituency: soccer players (and, of course, their moms). Today’s Los Angeles Times takes issue with something the president told Germany’s Bild am Sonntag newspaper for its Sunday editions. “As a boy, I never even saw a soccer ball,” the…
In case you missed it–and I know you did–the Dallas Stars’ first-round flop is looking more embarrassing by the day. With Mavs-Spurs and the EDS Byron Nelson Classic in our faces this week it’s difficult to think about the Stars. But what’s happening to the team that beat them–the Colorado…
On April 25, the Austin American-Statesman’s Kurt Bohls insisted the annual University of Texas-University of Oklahoma game at the Cotton Bowl was a goner come 2008. (OK, so he reported that someone close to UT and the Cotton Bowl said it was “80-20 that Texas will leave” the Red River…
This Saturday Lone Star Park’s all-time top trainer Steve Asmussen will run two horses in the Kentucky Derby—Private Vow and Storm Treasure—and hope to erase a pretty dreadful record in classic competition. Asmussen, who’s based in Texas, topped the U.S. trainer standings last year in wins and is ranked No…
It’s an annual rite of spring. On April 15–at precisely 11:59 p.m., if you’re like me–we do our taxes and write off the Texas Rangers. This year seemed no different. Before the season even started, prized pitcher Adam Eaton injured his finger. New leadoff man Brad Wilkerson started striking out…
Dallas Cowboys coach Bill Parcells came out of his and Dick Cheney’s spider hole yesterday to attend the Texas Rangers-Baltimore Orioles game at The Ameriquest Ballpark at Arlington Stadium–but, of course, InvisiBill wasn’t much interested in talking football or the draft…or much of anything. He says that’ll change Friday and…
