Who’s Guarding the County’s Guardians?

Let’s check back in, shall we, on our county’s “homeland security” program by which it is supposed to protect us from terrorist attack, massive flooding, tornado, pandemic, poison gas, things like that. I just want to see if we all understand what took place last week, and then I will…

Hurrah for a Hero at DISD

May I offer one more word about Joseph Drake, the Dallas teacher put on suspension last week after sending an argumentative email to school board member Edwin (“Snidely Whiplash”) Flores? Fourth-grade teacher Joseph Drake, who told Flores that his depiction of teachers as lazy slug-a-beds was demeaning, has now been…

Dallas Distortion Music Is In the Front Row

Welcome to Local Music ‘Mericans, where we get to know the people behind the scenes in Dallas/Fort Worth music. It blogs. It books cool local music shows. It’s a must-follow Facebook and Twitter page. It promotes bands, free of charge. So what is Dallas Distortion Music, exactly? Essentially, DDM is…

Bill Fisher is the Good Guy, So Why Are We Making Him Pay?

The worst thing that happens in this town, and it happens on a cyclical basis, is the official Scarlet Letter shunning of some person who did the right thing. It’s happening again. Two real estate outfits in Dallas, Odyssey Residential and Frazier Revitalization, are fighting for the same $20 million-plus…

Who you calling wimp, gabacho?

Dear Mexican: It’s so sad to see your wimpy answers. Your replies scream self-hatred and self-shame for your raza. No plan or desire to fix Mexico’s problems. You’re a puto with no huevos. My DREAM Act would be that you Mexicans would stop groveling to gringos, and scream about fixing…

This AKA Aaron Michaels Stuff Is Not Making Me Feel Terribly Homeland-Secure

Did anybody else feel less than homeland-secure after yesterday’s fandango with the Dallas County Homeland Security Advisory Committee? First, Dallas County Commissioner John Wiley Price tried to re-appoint to the committee the founder of an international anti-Semitic hate group — a guy best known locally for threatening to bring rifles…

Sound Advice: Lee Russell Pilots the Warship at Trees

Welcome to Local Music ‘Mericans, where we get to know the people behind the scenes in Dallas/Fort Worth music. Lee Russell has spent the last 27 years doing live sound at just about every major amphitheater in the country, traveled the world with some really big productions, and is the…

Blood in the Trinity, Crow on My Plate and Respect for the Caraways

Two years ago I toured the area around Columbia Packing Company on East 11th Street in Oak Cliff with city council member Dwaine Caraway and his wife, state Representative Barbara Mallory Caraway. The Caraways told me shocking stories of guts from nearby meat-packing operations piled in steaming heaps in the…

Governor Gaffe Comes Back to Texas, Wounded But No Wiser

Wait a minute. Forgive me, but I must misuse and abuse a bit of Dylan Thomas here to suggest we should not let Rick Perry go quite so gentle into that good night. I’m reading a lot of crap about how he bombed in his presidential campaign because he was…

Who’ll Stop the Rain? Rick Perry’s Pals, That’s Who.

Rick Perry wasn’t able to seize private property and build a Spanish toll road four football fields wide from Mexico to Oklahoma. He’s probably not going to get away with making academic research illegal. But his legacy may be even bigger. By the time he’s done being our governor, Perry…

Mexicans, Mormons and Mitt: More Alike Than You Think

Dear Readers: I usually save reruns of my columna for when I have to smuggle in the latest cousin from the rancho, but the ascendancy of Republic presidential candidate Mitt Romney must be addressed — namely, that he’s half-Mexican. The lamestream media is treating this as a revelation — never…

Zebra Mussel Threat to Texas Lakes is Misunderestimated

Three weeks ago I wrote a column for the paper about a plan to pump drinking water from Lake Texoma even though the lake is contaminated by zebra mussels, an invasive species that can annihilate other animal life in a lake and promote blooms of toxic algae. We here in…

The Queen of Excess: Kim Finch Rocks the Double and Single Wide

Welcome to Local Music ‘Mericans, where we get to know the people behind the scenes in Dallas/Fort Worth music. Who is Kim Finch? Hell if she knows. She’d pour you a nice shot if you could help her figure that out. Finch was once “Puncho Villa” in the Assassination City…

Is Bankrupt AMR About To Throw its Employees Under the Plane?

Stories in today’s Dallas Morning News and New York Times report that American Airlines could try to ditch some or all of its pension plans during its trip through bankruptcy court. We should all hate that. Every time we allow another business to slash the throats of its own retirees,…

Why Mexico Stinks at the Olympics

Dear Mexican: How come Mexicans don’t perform in the Winter Olympics? No talent? Or are Mexicans afraid of snow? I’m thinking both. Also, Mexicans don’t do too well in the Summer Olympics, either. They even suck in soccer. There is plenty of snow in Mexico, so don’t use that excuse…