Birther Nonsense a Window into White Souls

Last week The Associated Press did a story about the disgust and dismay of black Americans confronting the birther issue. “I find it hard to summarize in mere words the amount of pain and rage this incident has caused,” one man was quoted as saying at the top of the…

Why I Love Dealey Plaza, the City’s True Soul

Dealey Plaza, subject of my feature story in this week’s paper version of Unfair Park, is a monument to horror, a locus of global grief, a vortex of paranoia and all that stuff. But on a spring weekend when the weather’s good, it’s also just kind of a cool place…

Osama Bin Laden’s Death: My Top 10 Observer-ations

10. When I first heard President Obama was making an emergency announcement at 9:30 on a Sunday night, my first thought was … asteroid. Then aliens. Then NFL lockout. Then Osama Bin Laden. And somewhere along the process I figured it was just a ploy to interrupt Donald Trump’s Celebrity Apprentice…

Voters — Who Needs Them?

What is it that people here have against voting? I’m thinking about the item I saw here yesterday about the Dallas City Council clamping down on campaign signs. Right, we need to do everything we can to contain this voting thing. Fewer signs. Voter photo ID laws. Anything we can…

Whitt’s End: 4.29.11

[jump] *For all the Mavs’ fascination and obsession with beating the Lakers, the teams haven’t met in the playoffs in 23 years. It was 1988 when the Mavs — led by Mark Aguirre, Rolando Blackman and Roy Tarpley — pushed the eventual champs to a Game 7 at The Forum. Bad…

Charlie Sheen at AAC: My Top 10 Observer-ations

[jump] 5. Dumbest moment of the night: Sheen, wearing a CBS — “Can’t Beat Sheen” — T-shirt, bragged that “I got fired because I told my boss to fuck off.” Inexplicably, the crowd cheered. Some stood and cheered. Yeah, ‘cuz nobody’s gonna pay me $2 million an episode for a TV…

Mexicans Get a Bad Rap

Dear Mexican: Why does every Mexican rap/hip-hop song always contain the lines “No paramos,” “Nunca paramos,” or some other logically equivalent statement (e.g. “Siempre avanzaremos,” “No acabaremos de seguir,” etc.)? Can’t you people be more original? I mean, come on! It’s not like you all speak a language that makes…

Tom Leppert May Forget His Past. We Don’t.

Did anybody else have a serious gag reflex reading our former mayor’s what-a-good-boy-am-I essay on the op-ed page of The Dallas Morning News yesterday? Does Tom Leppert just assume people don’t remember a single thing about him? Or does he not remember a single thing about himself? His op-ed piece…

Challenging the Business-Growth Gospel

What is this crap about the importance of attracting more businesses to the city? They throw it out like a line from the Bible or something — especially mayoral candidates Mike Rawlings and Ron Natinsky. Got to “grow that tax base.” Only way we can grow that tax base is…

What’s Wrong with DART? The Suburbs.

No, no, no — not that same old crap again about how we need to get more suburbs to join Dallas Area Rapid Transit, our regional rail system. The suburbs are what’s wrong with DART. Screw the suburbs. Dallas needs to quit DART and let the suburbs go build their…

Whitt’s End: 4.22.11

Whether you’ve reached the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt’s End: *And then, after Jesus had died on the cross and was buried in his tomb, some rabbits rummaged through a nearby picnic and ate a bunch of chocolate and candy. Powered by a sugar high, the…

Not Even The News Can Endorse Neumann

The Dallas Morning News has just endorsed attorney Scott Griggs over incumbent District 3 council member Dave Neumann in the May election. If Neumann were a high school quarterback, this would be like his parents going across the field and cheering for the other team. Switching metaphors, for years Neumann…

Do Mexicans Poop in the Fields?

Dear Mexican: You seem like a smart guy and your input regarding an ethnic phenomenon I’ve observed would be of interest. I live in a tiny, gated neighborhood that I would describe as solidly middle- to upper-middle-class. On each side of me live Vietnamese small-business owners whose kids attend prestigious…