SM Seeks Mexican Woman. Slutty Virgin With Razor Blade Preferred.

Dear Mexican: In anticipation of the upcoming Reconquista, I’ve decided that I need a Mexican girlfriend. I feel this will help me fit in better with our new Mexican overlords. However, Mexican ladies must be approached with particular regard to culture and customs, and that raises many questions. A well-known…

George Lopez is Dallas Hip-Hop’s Networker

In the DFW hip-hop scene, George Lopez has been doin’ it and doin’ it and doin’ it, well, for more than 25 years. He’s most famously known for running T-Town Music, his label and independent hip-hop outlet, since 1994, out of a bazaar in Pleasant Grove. He’s deejayed since ’83,…

Eating Burger King’s First Bacon Sundae

So Burger King has a new bacon sundae on the menu. This means I have to eat it. And fast on the heels of a few hundred guisado verde tacos for lunch from La Nueva Fresh and Hot, I found myself in a Burger King drive-through. Nick was kind enough…

The Kids are All Right

Just when I have been doing some reporting on the role of younger leaders in our own fair city, young people nationally have come in for a minor hailstorm of criticism sparked by a commencement speech at a public high school in Wellesley, Massachusetts. A teacher, David McCullough Jr., son…

Yukon Ho! Canada Rolls Out a Welcome for Mexicans

Dear Mexican: I’m in this country illegally, but I have a current passport from the country I am from, and I have an international driver’s license. Occasionally, I fly commercially within the United States, and these docs are always sufficient. I wish to take a cruise to Alaska that leaves…

Dear Jennifer Sprague: Earning Your Big Bucks at DISD is a Snap

Jennifer. May I call you that? This is just between us. I like your picture. There’s a certain assertiveness there. I just like it. And this has all been so unfair so far. These news hacks — guys like Dallas Observer Editor Joe Tone, Unfair Park EditorEric Nicholson and that…

Cilantro and Five Other Foods That Divide Us

This weekend I was walking past a friend’s garden and noticed a beautiful row of dill plants. Atop each long, thin stem was a flurry of yellow trumpet flowers, and I thought, “I always say I hate dill, but really I’m probably being too harsh. How can something so beautiful…

The Overserved’s Guide to Being a Regular

Sometimes you really do want to go where everybody knows your name. If you’ve played your cards right, your favorite place will know your drink order, have a secret parking spot for you and let you stick around after hours. The art of the regular takes practice, so here are…

Granada Talent Buyer Ryan Henry Has His Ear to the Ground

Ryan Henry’s played with the New Frontiers and is ramping up a new act, Low Dark Hills, but we figured we’d catch him while he’s still largely behind-the-scenes at the Granada Theater, where he’s crawled up the ladder from working on their “Serenity” crew (who handle security and maintenance) to…

DART Still Badly Aimed

The longer the Dallas-area light rail system is around, the less of a habit it becomes, according to a story in this morning’s Dallas Morning News. The trend over the years has been for ridership to diminish at many stations after people get over the novelty of a train station…

What Does La Bajada Neighborhood Want? Why Not Ask Them?

I was right on the verge of what I am sure would have been a very satisfying episode of outrage, when my damned libtard alarm went off. It’s a case of certain past experiences coming back to haunt me, getting in the way of what might otherwise have been some…