Vanity Fair Pokes Fun At Tomato Lust

If you like anything passionately, Vanity Fair may have its sights set on you. The magazine has released a series of short videos bashing film and music snobs, and now they’re taking aim at food nerds.

Heirloom tomatoes are under attack, and the results are unfortunately hilarious and accurate. If you’ve spent half of your summer lusting after the perfect tomato, you’re as likely to find this video as entertaining as it is disturbing. I’m You’re so busted dude.

If you’ve wondered why tomatoes at the grocery store are so homogenous, you’ll see them picked green, gassed with ethylene and shipped all over the world. The mass produced tomatoes are a stark contrast to the heirloom scene, which uses the newly minted term gastro-rhapsodism before showing the irregular shaped vividly colored fruits — slowly.

As a funky porn track sets the background, luscious images fill the screen depicting Brandywine, Cherokee Purple and the Costoluto Genovese, which is ribbed for your pleasure.

Don’t miss it.