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SXSW soldiers on through Sunday, of course, but before our minds go supernova from the the plethora of great music, we’d like to share a few important things learned after Day One in the Chaos Machine. Also, our feet are like blood balloons so we need to sit down. That’s another lesson: Bring 1,400 pairs of shoes to SXSW 2013.
10. Jonathan Meiburg of Shearwater looks like Every Guy You Went to High School With, except he sings in deep firestorms of Beck-like hurt.
9. When someone asks, “Do you want my bag of Fritos?” you always say yes.
8. The more a club on Sixth Street smells like a sewer troll’s asshole, the better the beer probably is.
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7. Cover songs from Bruce Springsteen’s Nebraska are strongly encouraged. Apache Relay, a raucous Americana band, performed a kick-ass version of “State Trooper” at Swan Dive.
6. Hula Hoop Girl is difficult subject matter.
5. Fiona Apple fans push. At least 400 elbow clubbings were counted at Stubb’s BBQ. At least one was to the nards.
4. Ignore that coarse substance dripping down your leg when you’re in a crowd. You don’t want to know.
3. Keep your head up when you’re walking and texting, so you don’t miss annoying the band Dawes with a candid photograph.
2. Weasel your way into a packed club by walking fast and determined, like Jason Bourne. If you’re asked for credentials, pretend you have selective amnesia, and then dash away madly.
1. We all need a box accordion. Sharon Van Etten’s performance had one, and she was really, really good.
Bonus lesson learned: Your dog most likely isn’t enjoying his/her time at SXSW.
