Audio By Carbonatix
Air Guitar Regional Championship
June 11, 2009
The Loft
Better than: sitting at home praying it doesn’t rain anymore.
Plenty more photos in our slideshow.
Though it was brutally long at nearly five hours, last night’s Regional Air Guitar Championship was nonetheless a fascinating sociological experiment.
The evening at The Loft started off inauspiciously with a heavy metal tribute act playing the expected set list of songs by AC/DC, Def Leppard and The Scorpions.
But once the air guitarists took the stage, things started looking up.
The first round consisted of 15 guys and gals prancing around the stage
in various forms of undress. When one local lass going by the name of
Martha Young Guns took the stage, her shapely blonde friend presented
herself in front of the judge’s table (where yours truly was seated)
and proceeded to lift her dress off. Needless to say, all three judges
got an eyeful: no panties, pierced nipples and absolutely nothing
whatsoever out of place. The shapely lass ended up showing us her wares
a total of three times. Amazingly, her friend did not win.
Sure, after
that display, it was difficult to envision the night improving. But, by
the time the fifteen were whittled down to five, the participants,
crowd and judges were sufficiently wasted enough to enjoy just about anything.
Austin resident Jason Shaw (aka MOD) ended up taking first place, earning
a trip to Washington, D.C., for the National Air Guitar Championships.
Runners up included Dentonite Jeff Morrison (aka Johnny Van Fretmaster)
and some big, fat Hispanic dude who went by the handle “Weezy.”
Only
about 100 truly supportive friends and family made it to the club, but
they were loud and rowdy throughout the event.
Oh, and I was booed quite a bit
less than last year. But after a few too many Shiners, I basically gave
everybody the same score.
Critic’s Notebook
Personal Bias:
I basically felt like a geek loser all night. I probably haven’t played
air guitar since high school and I cannot envision ever doing so again.
Random
Note: Sponsored by Boone’s Farm, the event also featured two buxomly
wine maidens who perused the crowd handing out free samples. The two
were, however, a bit on the older side, prompting one patron to ask,
“Who sent us the over-the-hill gang?
